Yesterday I was feeling a little bit down.
I was just being real cranky. I snapped at Hubs for no reason, I laid around feeling like a lazy bum, and I felt absolutely and totally useless in the world. I stared at my computer screen for 20 minutes but couldn't think of a darn thing to write, so I missed my daily blog post.
I tried to figure out what was going on in this little head of Bon Bon's. Why the sudden moodiness? Deep in thought, I figured out a few things that may be contributing to my case of temporary grumps:
- I feel very much so in a state of limbo right now. Teaching hasn't started but our painting job has ended, meaning I've got a couple of weeks of dead time. I would love to go on a little vacation or do something fun with this window of time, but Hubs has rehearsals every night, meaning we're stuck here. I feel totally unproductive and lame.
-I also feel in limbo as far as the living situation goes. I need to have my own space and be independent. While I am insanely grateful to my mom for letting us crash her basement, I also feel an urgency to find an apartment. There hasn't been anything that fits our needs. My sis-in-law texted yesterday and said there was a great apartment at a cheap price available... The problem is it's about five miles further from my school than I wanted. I'm already looking at a 40 minute commute... I don't want to make it 50 minutes. It might be only ten minutes, but that's ten minutes twice a day, five days a week. Am I being too picky? Should I just give up on some of my expectations for a living space?
-I've been frustrated with unhelpful apartment owners. I emailed one guy two days ago (no phone number was available) about when the townhouse he had advertised would be available. I got an email back, "It isn't available yet." Umm... okay. So when exactly WILL the apartment be available? I think this guy needs to get hired on as world's most helpful person, whaddya think?
-Yesterday I paid $1500 for tuition (Hubs' last semester, HALLELUJAH!) $200 for a plane ticket, and another $100 on my car. Spending money makes me kinda grumpy. Spending A LOT of money makes me think about becoming a serial killer.
-I've got a lot of big goals for this bloggy blog of mine and it's been frustrating to not see them pan out as I had hoped. I lack patience, and I struggle comparing myself to other bloggers. When I first started blogging consistently, I found the most successful blogger I've seen and tried to match her in all of her accomplishments. Might not have been my best idea. Now I find myself frustrated and demanding more from the blog instead of being happy at the wonderful accomplishments its already made. I know comparison is bad- I know each person, each writing style, each blog is unique and that you can't possible try to compare them all. But I struggle with it nonetheless. (And while we're on the topic, nonetheless is totally one of the coolest words ever. Use it in daily conversation and feel like a vocabulary master!)
-In relation to the blog, I've been trying for about a month to sponsor Sydney at the Daybook. I email her about every week and I have gotten no response. I've even tried to get creative sending emails like, "I WANT TO GIVE YOU MY MONEY! ALL I ASK IS ONE DAY ON YOUR BLOG! YOU KNOW YOU LIKE MONEY!" What's a girl gotta do to get a hold of a big bigtime blogger?
And so, I suppose, for all of these reasons I was feeling a bit down. It didn't help that my day was pretty much open- free to watch Bachelor Pad to my heart's content and feel like a true loser for having nothing to do on a Wednesday afternoon except for laze around and stare at the TV.
Finally, I decided to be productive. I made a list of tasks and errands that needed to be accomplished, and headed out. One of these things was to hit up the library and do some serious blog networking. I was sitting at a computer at the library, minding my own business, when a pretty Latina girl approached me.
"Excuse me, but I can't help but see that you are on the computer." Yes. Yes I am. How smart you are.
"I was wondering if you could vote for me for Miss Utah Latina?" I raised my eyebrows as she handed me a slip of paper. "All you have to do is follow these directions- go on to facebook, like the page, and then vote for me- Ester Palacinos"
At this point I was feeling a little bit like my personal space was being encroached upon so I responded quickly, "Yah, no problem," just so that she would leave.
"I can help you do it- it's a bit confusing."
"Uh... I think I'm good. This slip of paper is pretty self explanatory."
That finally got rid of her. I did my business for awhile, and then mostly because I would feel guilty if I didn't, I logged onto facebook and voted for Ester for Miss Utah Latina.
"Umm... excuse me, I was watching, and I think you're doing it wrong. I can help you." I jumped ten feet and let out a little scream. Miss Latina was back. I don't know if I should have been more alarmed that she had been watching me this whole time or that she had sneaked up on me without me hearing a peep. This girl was good.
"Are you sure? I just clicked right here and voted for your name."
"Oh! Perfect! You're amazing! Thank you so much! It's really close between me and this other girl," she explained. She flashed a pretty smile and pranced off with her slips of paper to torment more unsuspecting library patrons.
I couldn't help but laugh. This chick was amazing. I consider myself a brave person, but I could NEVER have the guts to approach perfect strangers at a library, demand they vote for me, and then watch to make sure they do it right. Ester has got some courage and I hope she wins just from her sheer tenacity.
Somehow that cheered me up. Just the fact that here I am stressing about a place to live and my huge goals that aren't being reached fast enough, and here she is, scamming the library for potential votes. I guess it could always be worse. I could always be vying for Miss Utah Latina.
The other thing that cheered me up?
Buddy got a bad haircut. Serves him right for being so naughty to me on Tuesday!
Vengeance is sweet, Buddy. Vengeance is sweet!
MORAL OF THE STORY: When you are feeling down remember that it could be worse: You could be trying to win Miss Utah Latina or you could be an ugly toy poodle.
I was just being real cranky. I snapped at Hubs for no reason, I laid around feeling like a lazy bum, and I felt absolutely and totally useless in the world. I stared at my computer screen for 20 minutes but couldn't think of a darn thing to write, so I missed my daily blog post.
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| Yes, this is a pic my brother took of my while I was sleeping. He's a jerk for taking it. I'm awesome for exploiting it on my blog. |
I tried to figure out what was going on in this little head of Bon Bon's. Why the sudden moodiness? Deep in thought, I figured out a few things that may be contributing to my case of temporary grumps:
- I feel very much so in a state of limbo right now. Teaching hasn't started but our painting job has ended, meaning I've got a couple of weeks of dead time. I would love to go on a little vacation or do something fun with this window of time, but Hubs has rehearsals every night, meaning we're stuck here. I feel totally unproductive and lame.
-I also feel in limbo as far as the living situation goes. I need to have my own space and be independent. While I am insanely grateful to my mom for letting us crash her basement, I also feel an urgency to find an apartment. There hasn't been anything that fits our needs. My sis-in-law texted yesterday and said there was a great apartment at a cheap price available... The problem is it's about five miles further from my school than I wanted. I'm already looking at a 40 minute commute... I don't want to make it 50 minutes. It might be only ten minutes, but that's ten minutes twice a day, five days a week. Am I being too picky? Should I just give up on some of my expectations for a living space?
-I've been frustrated with unhelpful apartment owners. I emailed one guy two days ago (no phone number was available) about when the townhouse he had advertised would be available. I got an email back, "It isn't available yet." Umm... okay. So when exactly WILL the apartment be available? I think this guy needs to get hired on as world's most helpful person, whaddya think?
-Yesterday I paid $1500 for tuition (Hubs' last semester, HALLELUJAH!) $200 for a plane ticket, and another $100 on my car. Spending money makes me kinda grumpy. Spending A LOT of money makes me think about becoming a serial killer.
-I've got a lot of big goals for this bloggy blog of mine and it's been frustrating to not see them pan out as I had hoped. I lack patience, and I struggle comparing myself to other bloggers. When I first started blogging consistently, I found the most successful blogger I've seen and tried to match her in all of her accomplishments. Might not have been my best idea. Now I find myself frustrated and demanding more from the blog instead of being happy at the wonderful accomplishments its already made. I know comparison is bad- I know each person, each writing style, each blog is unique and that you can't possible try to compare them all. But I struggle with it nonetheless. (And while we're on the topic, nonetheless is totally one of the coolest words ever. Use it in daily conversation and feel like a vocabulary master!)
-In relation to the blog, I've been trying for about a month to sponsor Sydney at the Daybook. I email her about every week and I have gotten no response. I've even tried to get creative sending emails like, "I WANT TO GIVE YOU MY MONEY! ALL I ASK IS ONE DAY ON YOUR BLOG! YOU KNOW YOU LIKE MONEY!" What's a girl gotta do to get a hold of a big bigtime blogger?
And so, I suppose, for all of these reasons I was feeling a bit down. It didn't help that my day was pretty much open- free to watch Bachelor Pad to my heart's content and feel like a true loser for having nothing to do on a Wednesday afternoon except for laze around and stare at the TV.
Finally, I decided to be productive. I made a list of tasks and errands that needed to be accomplished, and headed out. One of these things was to hit up the library and do some serious blog networking. I was sitting at a computer at the library, minding my own business, when a pretty Latina girl approached me.
"Excuse me, but I can't help but see that you are on the computer." Yes. Yes I am. How smart you are.
"I was wondering if you could vote for me for Miss Utah Latina?" I raised my eyebrows as she handed me a slip of paper. "All you have to do is follow these directions- go on to facebook, like the page, and then vote for me- Ester Palacinos"
At this point I was feeling a little bit like my personal space was being encroached upon so I responded quickly, "Yah, no problem," just so that she would leave.
"I can help you do it- it's a bit confusing."
"Uh... I think I'm good. This slip of paper is pretty self explanatory."
That finally got rid of her. I did my business for awhile, and then mostly because I would feel guilty if I didn't, I logged onto facebook and voted for Ester for Miss Utah Latina.
"Umm... excuse me, I was watching, and I think you're doing it wrong. I can help you." I jumped ten feet and let out a little scream. Miss Latina was back. I don't know if I should have been more alarmed that she had been watching me this whole time or that she had sneaked up on me without me hearing a peep. This girl was good.
"Are you sure? I just clicked right here and voted for your name."
"Oh! Perfect! You're amazing! Thank you so much! It's really close between me and this other girl," she explained. She flashed a pretty smile and pranced off with her slips of paper to torment more unsuspecting library patrons.
I couldn't help but laugh. This chick was amazing. I consider myself a brave person, but I could NEVER have the guts to approach perfect strangers at a library, demand they vote for me, and then watch to make sure they do it right. Ester has got some courage and I hope she wins just from her sheer tenacity.
Somehow that cheered me up. Just the fact that here I am stressing about a place to live and my huge goals that aren't being reached fast enough, and here she is, scamming the library for potential votes. I guess it could always be worse. I could always be vying for Miss Utah Latina.
The other thing that cheered me up?
Buddy got a bad haircut. Serves him right for being so naughty to me on Tuesday!
Vengeance is sweet, Buddy. Vengeance is sweet!
MORAL OF THE STORY: When you are feeling down remember that it could be worse: You could be trying to win Miss Utah Latina or you could be an ugly toy poodle.
