Today was a really good day at school. We're reading Hamlet in my senior classes and before we ever started the play I promised that as we read I would do my best to help those rascally little perverts find every dirty hidden meaning possible. The looked up to me with those big brown eyes, "Do you mean it, Teacher? Will you really show us the dirty stuff?" I crossed my heart and hoped to die and vowed right then and there to to point out to them every sexual innuendo I could find because, well, seventeen year olds. They can't get enough of it and sometimes a teacher must resort to desperate measures to get her kids to pay a lick of attention. As promised, I have faithfully pointed out all sexual innuendo and my reward has been a class that is very very engaged. Suddenly they can't get enough of old Billy Shakes. Ah, teenagers. They ain't too hard to figure out.
(Also, on a separate but related note, I always love it when parents tell me that they are so grateful I teach clean literature like Shakespeare instead of all the "dirt" and "garbage" that is produced nowadays. That is when I truly know they know nothing about Shakespeare.)
In other news, my pup is really growing up! It's the craziest thing. (I've never been responsible for any living thing besides me before, so bear with me while I tell all of you folks who are likely responsible for several tiny humans what it's like to be in charge of a 2 pound dog. I'm sure you have no idea what responsibility is or anything.) He's twice as big as he was a month ago and it breaks my heart a little to see how fast he is growing. He answers to his name now. (Ish.) I used to have to carry him down the stairs because he was too scared to go on his own and now he just charges right down them like a man on a mission. I know it's dumb, but freak, it kind of pains my heart a little bit to see him descend those stairs by himself. He's growing faster than I want him to which begs the question, how in the world do people ever let their babies go to kindergarten?
In other news, I've got a lot of reading to get done tonight. I am finishing John Green's Looking for Alaska and I really need to get reading A Thousand Splendid Suns for this month's blog book club. Remember, if you aren't reading yet to grab a copy and start now. I promise you will be glad you did.
Taking over for the rest of the day is Kate. She's also got a husband and a dog so she's kind of like to me except for she lives in Virginia and likes to drink wine while she dances around her kitchen which I have never done but imagine I would be pretty dang good at. You're up, Kate!
Hello, fellow Life of Bon readers! My name is Kate and I blog over at Thoroughly Modern. During the day I run the 4-H program for my county here in the beautiful commonwealth of Virginia, and at night I try to be the best wife and puppy mother east of the Mississippi.(Also, on a separate but related note, I always love it when parents tell me that they are so grateful I teach clean literature like Shakespeare instead of all the "dirt" and "garbage" that is produced nowadays. That is when I truly know they know nothing about Shakespeare.)
In other news, my pup is really growing up! It's the craziest thing. (I've never been responsible for any living thing besides me before, so bear with me while I tell all of you folks who are likely responsible for several tiny humans what it's like to be in charge of a 2 pound dog. I'm sure you have no idea what responsibility is or anything.) He's twice as big as he was a month ago and it breaks my heart a little to see how fast he is growing. He answers to his name now. (Ish.) I used to have to carry him down the stairs because he was too scared to go on his own and now he just charges right down them like a man on a mission. I know it's dumb, but freak, it kind of pains my heart a little bit to see him descend those stairs by himself. He's growing faster than I want him to which begs the question, how in the world do people ever let their babies go to kindergarten?
In other news, I've got a lot of reading to get done tonight. I am finishing John Green's Looking for Alaska and I really need to get reading A Thousand Splendid Suns for this month's blog book club. Remember, if you aren't reading yet to grab a copy and start now. I promise you will be glad you did.
Taking over for the rest of the day is Kate. She's also got a husband and a dog so she's kind of like to me except for she lives in Virginia and likes to drink wine while she dances around her kitchen which I have never done but imagine I would be pretty dang good at. You're up, Kate!
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| Family selfie session! |
In short, I'm just your average, twenty something brunette who also happens to be a big ol' scaredy cat procrastinator.
That's right. You heard me--PROCRASTINATOR.
Maybe this is just me, but when I was in college it was kind of cool to roll your eyes, sigh, and talk about how you're such a procrastinator. I would be up until 3am, playing John Mayer on repeat until I couldn't take it anymore, and then I'd get up early to finish and print off that 8 page paper with only 15 minutes left to jump in my car and head to class.
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| Birthday cakes: A typical result of my procrastination in college. |
These days, even though I'm a grown-up with a grown-up job, I still procrastinate like it's the only thing I know. Some may view procrastination as laziness, or a result of ADHD, but I know there are two big forces behind my procrastination: fear and self doubt.
Looking back, there was always fear involved--fear of failure, or the fear of creating work that was not up to standard. I also couldn't help but doubt myself. The truth is, when I have these big, important projects coming up, I slowly start to doubt that I am capable of creating high quality work that is completely my own. All that negativity just creeps in and settles in my soul and brings me down. It reaches the point where all I want to do is avoid it, so instead of doing what needs to be done, I'll play candy crush, or read a book, or even go do laundry, because I just don't want to face the fear that I will never be good enough for the standards I've set for myself.
Pretty heavy stuff for a Tuesday, amiright?!? As you can imagine, I procrastinated writing this post. Yes, I did have quite a bit going on with work and family these past few weeks, but once again I was scared. I put too much pressure on myself trying to come up with a unique, eye-catching guest post, and before I knew it I was at my deadline and I needed SOMETHING.
Luckily, this post came out of my procrastination, and it has been cathartic being able to realize the origins of this nasty habit. Will I keep procrastinating after this moment? Absolutely. But I hope I will be slightly more aware of what's keeping me from doing the task at hand, and I will push through that fear and self doubt and start building up my confidence. Not that I'm biased or anything, but I've got a pretty swell husband who has always believed in me, even when I don't believe in myself.
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| We don't look this shiny in real life. Three cheers for professional photographers! |
Have a beautiful day!
