The Life of Bon: February 2016

Monday, February 29, 2016

13 Things That May Not Be True About Having Children

 A couple weeks ago Taylor wrote a blog post about when she is ready to have kids.  Lots of people her age from her home town have 1, 2, 3 kids, but she says she's just not ready yet.  Wants to soak up her pre-baby days a little longer. To quote:

"Last night Harlow [her dog] had a bit of an upset stomach so I had to let him outside five different times from 2 a.m.- 4 a.m  and the only thing I could think about was how my friends with babies do this every. single. night. How do they function the next day? I just don't get it. Being a parent looks exhausting. Rewarding, yes. But so so exhausting."

 It was an awesome post and got lots of great comments from people all over blog land who agreed with her.  People commented that they like sleeping in, going to brunch, and going on vacations too much to dive into baby-hood just quite yet.  One commenter even joked "do you even get to go to happy hour or watch tv when you have kids?"

I was going to leave a big fat comment in response to all this, and then realized I had too much to say for one comment and so I texted Tay and told her I wanted to write a blog response to her blog post (oh, bloggers) and she replied go for it ya weirdo and here we are!

I really really liked Taylor's post because I think it echoes so clearly what so many people feel before they have kids.  It was definitely how I felt!  I was terrified.  Scared pantless.  I wrote this post after I got pregnant- basically a "what have I done, there's no turning back and what if I hate this?!?" post.  I thought everything that most people who commented on Tay's post thought.  No more brunch!  No vacations!  No sleep til Brooklyn FOREVER.

Well, with a 20 month old baby/toddler I am happy to report some news about having kids.  I've learned some things.  And it's not nearly as scary/ hellish/ life stopping as some may have you believe. I am here to bust the myths and clear the record!

13 Things That May Not Be True About Having Children

June at one month old.  I never thought I could keep a baby alive for a whole month!

1.  You never get to sleep!  Yes, the first few months while the baby is learning how to sleep is a little wild.  But you don't get up five or six times a night!  That's a myth.  Maybe it happens for some extremely difficult babies. But it's not the norm! When June was a newborn I was up twice a night with her.  I pulled her into bed while she nursed in the middle of the night, and I drowsily read my book and then I put her back in the bassinet beside me and we both fell back asleep.  Those middle of the night feedings now are some of my favorite happy memories with teeny tiny baby June.  By four months old, June was sleeping through the night. It took a little training, but really it wasn't bad.  She almost always sleeps through the night now.  She usually does a good old fashioned 7 pm- 8 am sleep session.  THIRTEEN HOURS!  Up until a few months ago June took two long naps during the day and I got all my shiz done.  Now she takes one long nap and it is equally awesome.  Now, I know June is a really good sleeper and that not all kids sleep like this.  But guess what?  A lot of people have kids who are really good sleepers.  We just don't talk a lot about it because we feel like it's insensitive to the people who have kids who are bad sleepers.  But not all babies sleep like crap!  In fact, I would even venture to say that most sleep really well.  And if your baby is up in the night, you have an amazing excuse to take a nap the next day.  Nap when the baby naps!  You don't have to be sleep deprived all the time!

2  You can't ever leave your baby!  Your baby is not an appendage to your body.  There are lots of people who are very capable of making sure the baby doesn't die in a three or four hour period.  Especially the father of that child!  It always blows my mind how little some moms will leave their babies with the husbands.  Yep, they're perfectly capable!  A few months ago I was shopping with a friend and I saw a former student of mine and Greg's.  "WHERE'S YOUR BABY!?" she accosted me.  Uh... the baby is with her father!  She's with her dad a lot of the time!  The baby who has two parents who are both perfectly capable of taking care of her needs.  And when Greg and I want to go out together we are lucky enough to have grandparents close by who are excited to watch June so we can catch a movie or dinner.  And when grandparents aren't available WE PAY FOR A BABYSITTER.  IT'S A NOVEL IDEA.  I get so frustrated when women have babies and then act like they can never go anywhere or do anything without that baby.  It involves a little more planning ahead, yes, but by no means are you now banished to your home forever and ever with your child never to appear in public with people ever again.

3.  You no longer have the same interests.  I remember when I was pregnant with June and told people of my plans to continue to work that some people hinted to me that once I had a baby I would no longer want to teach.  They told my all my priorities would shift.  Well.  My priorities did shift.  June is definitely priority #1.  But I still like to teach.  In fact, I still NEED to teach.  I need the social interaction, I need to get out of the house, I need to have an identity that is not mom.  I get so much joy and satisfaction from my job.  I understand that not everyone wants to continue to work after they have children, and I totally respect that.  But if you like doing stand up comedy on Monday nights (like Tay!) then you can still do stand up comedy on Monday nights!  Almost all of my college besties with kids still work in some capacity.  They are nurses, entrepreneurs, lawyers, occupational therapists, etc.  We don't all work full time, but we all have kids and we all *SHOCK* still enjoy the same interests we did before we had kids.

4.  You never get to go to brunch again!  When your baby is six months or younger it is super easy to bring the baby along with you.  She (or he) will mostly sleep in their car seat all the time.  And once they are older you put them in a high chair and give them little bits of food and it is awesome.  I love taking June out with Greg and me.  I mean, we're not idiots, so we don't take her to dinner late at night when she's crazy tired and screams her head off, but a lunch date with June and Greg is one of my all time favorite things.

5.  You will never sleep in again!  Such a lie!  You still get to sleep in after you have a baby!  This one shocked me!  I remember in the hospital when June was 2 days old Greg and I slept in until 10 am one morning because June just kept snoozing!  And I thought, sheesh, I better not tell anyone that we weren't up all night with June or they'll think we're the worst parents ever.  Now on weekends Greg and I switch off who gets to sleep in.  One of us gets to sleep in until 9 or 10 while the other gets up at 8 with June to watch cartoons.  I mean, really, it's a tough gig either way!

6.  You can't travel anymore.  Yes, you can still go on vacations!  And they're even more fun with a kid!  I love taking June places with us.  Everything is more fun with a kid to show the world to.  I loved going to Mexico with June last summer and our road trip to Arizona was a blast with June in tow and nothing is better than a sunny beach day with a baby.  I just love bringing June on all of our adventures.  Because we have such willing grandparents, Greg and I get to take vacations without June too.  Which I highly encourage!  Take advantage of grandparents!  Just last weekend we got to go to southern Utah for three days and we left June at home.  We slept in, went hiking, enjoyed the sun, ate out, sat in hot tubs.  It was great.  But the best part was when it was over we got to come home and smother June with kisses.  Nothing beats coming home to see your babe after you haven't seen her for a day or two.

June bug at the beach in California.


7.  You no longer get out with friends.  Not true!  In fact, I think it's easier to make friends with a kid because the kids serve as a little buffer.  Like, "hey... let's take the kids to the park this week."  I feel like I get out to do stuff with girlfriends more than ever because we both want to take the kids out to do something.  I have more social interaction than I've had since college.

8.  You never get time to yourself.  We put June down in between 7 and 7:30 every night.  It's a dream!  I have my whole night to do what I want uninterrupted.  I blog, I work on our business, I read books, I watch Jazz games and Netflix.  I make cookies.  Sometimes I just sit on my phone and do nothing.  The trick to sanity when you have children is to make sure that there is still some independence.  You gotta keep your sense of self.  For me that means putting June down early and getting to do my own thing at night.  Oh, and sometimes we call a babysitter to come watch Netflix  at our house while June sleeps so we can get out together.

9.  You will be so busy with your new baby you will literally never have time to shower or get dressed.  I had it in my mind that after I had a baby I would never look presentable.  A shower was just out of the question.  It's not out of the question at all!  I get dressed every day.  I take a shower.  Even my days when I don't go to work!  On my days at home, June and I usually have some activity that we are going to in the morning so we get up and get going.  If I wanted to stay in my sweats all day I could, but just because I had a baby doesn't mean I'm wearing pajamas all day every day from here on out.

10.  Nothing is as fun anymore.  It is always crazy to me when people say they don't want to have kids because they want to have more "fun" first.  Everything is more fun with a kid!  You think you like Christmas now, wait until you have a kid!  And Halloween with a kid is the total bomb.  I love having June as my companion even on every day, mundane things.  I love taking her to go grocery shopping, to make a deposit at the bank, to go to Target.  We get our popcorn and our soda and we just dominate Target.  Yes, it takes longer to buckle her up and get her out of the car seat, but it's not that big of a deal.  I love having a little friend to go on all my errands with me.

11.  Having a baby is soooooo expensive.    People love to talk about how much money it is to have a kid.   Babies are not expensive.  Tons of unnecessary baby crap is expensive.  There is SO much stuff you could buy for a kid, but the truth is you don't need that much of it.  You need a car seat, a stroller, a crib, diapers and clothes.  The other stuff you can take as it comes and there are always places to buy used stuff.  Yes, the kid will obviously be expensive over time, but it's not like you just throw ten grand down the second you have a baby.  I bought almost everything used for June.  And people are often really generous, especially with your first baby.  If you have a baby shower you will be covered for so many of the basic things.  I promise, the endless baby gear thing is just to scare you!  There's not that much you really need.  (I saw the other day a contraption that warms up baby wipes for you... I mean, come on people!)

12. Having a baby is the most exhausting in the world.   Yes, you will be tired some days, but love trumps exhaustion every time.  Okay I know it's cheesy but I just wish that moms talked more about how much we love being moms instead of how "exhausting" being a mom is.  I'll be honest, it is work.  But everything in my life that has ever meant anything to me has been work.  I'm not afraid of work.  So when someone says, "Oh having a kid is a lot of work" I don't think that should scare us off.  And it's my favorite kind of work!  Which would I rather do.... clean the kitchen, put up some new listings on our etsy shop, write a blog post, grade papers, or give June a bath, read her stories and put her to sleep.  June!  June wins every time!  Yes it's work but it the best work ever. Nothing in this world that I have ever done has brought me so much satisfaction or joy or fulfillment as being June's mom.

13.  Your love life/ romantic connection with your partner goes down the tube.  Not true!  In fact, you feel close to your spouse/ significant other in an entirely new way.  No one in the world understands how much I love June like Greg does.  He is the only person on Earth who gets it.  Having that bond has really really helped us during the tough times and the good times.  I love connecting with Greg over June.  Only he truly understands how cute she looks in her strawberry jammies.

Alright, I think I've gone off long enough.  All I'm saying is to everyone who wants to delay having kids as long as possible because you don't want your life to be over, YOUR LIFE WILL NOT BE OVER. It is totally okay that you want to delay having kids, but when do bite the bullet know that it will be totally awesome.  You can still enjoy all the things you did before, it will just be a little different.  And more fun!  I promise.  Having kids is the coolest thing ever.  I wish I had known this before I had June.  I wish I could have understood how much I would enjoy it.  I had a student interview me for a health/marriage/family class the other day and one of the questions he was required to ask was, "Do you wish you would have waited longer to have kids?" and I thought about it and said confidently, "No.  Not at all.  If I had known how much I enjoyed being a mom, I would have had kids earlier, actually."  And I mean it.  Nothing in this world has brought me the kind of joy that being June's mom has.  I'd do it again a million times.

(addendum:  I know that some moms experience many of the things that I said are not always true, and I don't want to take away from the experience of anyone.  I know some moms are totally validated in feeling exhausted, like they can never leave their child, like they have no friends, etc, etc, etc.  But I don't think that's the norm of motherhood and I don't think we should allow those difficult experiences of some to define what motherhood looks like for everyone.  To me, motherhood is a much more fun and joy filled experience than that.  Women are allowed to give their difficult experiences of motherhood without apology, and I think mothers who don't struggle with those issues should be allowed to give their easy, fun, joyous experiences without apology as well.  And I can say confidently that no matter how much one person has struggled being a mom if I asked her, "Is it worth it?" she would say resolutely YES.  So to me, that's how we should be portraying motherhood.  As totally absolutely worth it.)

P.S.  It's Leap Year!  We're having a one day sale for 25% off everything in the store at Hey June because this day only comes once every four years!  Use code LEAPYEAR for 25% off your order. Good February 29, 2016 only.

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Bon's Book Club February: A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Backman

Alright ladies and gents, it's book club time!  Just a real quick reminder how Bon's Book Club works- we all read a book and then on the last Thursday of the month we gather here to talk about it.  There will be some questions that you can answer or not answer- whatever floats your boat.  Each month I will have a co-host helping me move this discussion along.  You can read our thoughts on the book and then add your two cents in the comments or link up your post that you did on your own blog.  

January:  These is my Words by Nancy E. Turner

February: A Man Called Ove by Fredrik Backman

March:  Quiet:  The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
April:  Attachments by Rainbow Rowell
May:  Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult
June:  Why Not Me?  by Mindy Kaling
July:  Room by Emma Donoghue
August:  The Martian by Andy Weir
September: So You've Been Publicly Shamed by Jon Ronson
October:  Major Pettigrew's Last Stand by Helen Simonson
November: The Nightingale by Kristin Hannah

+ Is Ove likeable enough to you?  Likeable enough to carry an entire book?
+ Who was your favorite character and why?
+ What was the purpose of the constantly talked about cat and saab?  What point was Backman trying to make?
+ What did you think of Ove and Sonja's relationship?  How do you think it affected him?
+ In the story, Ove mentiones that when people don't share sorrow, it can drive them apart.  This happens to him and his friend, Rune.  Do you think this is a true or accurate statement?

This month my co-host is Sierra and I will give you her take on the book first.

I am so excited to join Bon in being her co-host this month! 

One thing that is so interesting to me about book clubs is that I came away from them with such a different perspective than I did before going in. This novel caused such an interesting discussion because some members of the group did not love the cheesiness that accompanied this story. Call me a romantic (okay, I am one!) but I loved it. I loved the heartfelt, compelling story that showed that even a horrible man like Ove, all have a good side, even if it's in unconventional ways. I think that Ove's character is incredibly unlikeable. In a way, almost painful. He is, frankly, horrible. He is a bitter old man (although the book said that he was 59? Since when is that considered old? That was a bit confusing) who clearly has a lot of negative emotion to work through. For me, I wanted to learn about his past. I know that Ove was stuck in his ways because of experiences that we went through. So I wanted to keep reading so that I could understand WHY he was acting that way. I don't think that Ove could have  carried the story alone. I think that he needed some serious help from his hilarious neighbors, if that makes sense. With that, my favorite character in the story is Paravaneh. I loved her. So much. I loved that she was feisty and annoying, but you loved her in spite of that. I loved that she didn't take Ove's crap. She added some pizzazz and realistic nature to the story. 

The way that Ove talks about his and Sonja's relationship will tear at any female's heartstrings. It is clear that he felt that she married way below her level. In his mind, Sonja was perfect because she had passed on. And although that was a little annoying, for me, it was endearing. When someone passes on, you tend to just remember the good things. I hope that my husband thinks of our memories and me the way that Ove does with his spouse. 

In the story, Ove mentions that when you don't share sorrow, it can drive you apart. That is what happened with him and his neighbor Rhune. I think that this is SO true. Often times when someone is going through a hard time, they need someone to step up and in a sense say "I'm here for you. I've been through this." These types of trials either make or break a relationship. Unfortunately, for Rhune and Ove, the death of a loved one, tore them apart. I have seen this happen in my own life and the lives of so many others, so I could relate to this part of the story immensely. 

Oh, the cat. I love the cat. The cat symbolized, in my opinion, Sonja. Ove talks about her love for cats and when he meets cat, he feels a sense of duty to take care of it...for Sonja's sake. I actually thought it was funny because he IS a cat. He is fickle and particular--cats only like you if they choose to like you, and that's exactly what Ove does. I felt that they were companions and that he could subconsciously, relate to this cat. The saab. The stupid Saab. So annoying. I wanted the author to shut up about it! But the Saab symbolizes his unwillingness to change. Also, the fact that he put his heart and soul into that car and it was something that he prided himself in. 

All in all, this book was not perfect. It had many flaws. It wasn't written amazingly well (was it translated from Swedish, by the way? We were wondering that in book club? I know he is a Swedish author...), One's grumpiness, for me, got quite annoying (Like...we get are pissed off at the world!) and the idealism that correlates with this story can be unrealistic. But, honestly, I loved it. I found myself crying towards the last few pages because it just made me want to be a better person. As cheesy as that sounds. I loved seeing the beauty of change in mankind and all the wonderful things that can happen when you have a "village that loves you."


So I think I must have been the person who Sierra was referring to who didn't like the cheesy, romantic story.  Don't get me wrong!  I love a good story that tugs on the old heart strings.  But I did have a few problems with A Man Called Ove mainly in that everything wrapped up a little too perfectly for me at the end.  It was like we just wrapped all our problems up and put beautiful little bows on them and placed them underneath the Christmas tree and isn't life just perfect?  One book club member said she appreciated that because so little is that way now- in real life and in our media- so it was refreshing to read something that tied up perfectly even if, admittedly, it wasn't realistic.  I can see that.  I guess I had to suspend my sense of reality a little bit to "buy" the end of the book.

For me I also struggled with the book because there was so little plot.  I get that it's a character driven story, but I would have liked something to happen.  I was much more interested in the back story, and found that to be my driving force in reading the book.  I really enjoyed reading about Ove and Sonja's relationship (although it did bother me a little that someone as perfect as Sonja would marry someone as grumpy and mean as Ove) and I really enjoyed the backstory of Ove and his dad.  Those were the parts of the story that propelled me forward- the present story line was pretty boring for me.

I think the main take away from the book and the thing that I liked about it was Danica mentioned that in  real life it's hard to give people like Ove much of a chance because they're so grumpy and mean and we're just like, "Ugh!  Old grumpy people.  Just learn to be nice!"  I think the most interesting conversation stemmed from that- that "being nice" is different for different people and that we don't have to ask people to "be nice" on our terms.  For example, Ove is a very thoughtful, considerate person in a lot of ways (he lets the boy who has been kicked out of his house live with him, he takes care of the stray cat, drives Paravenah and Patrick to the hospital) but he isn't nice in the conventional, obvious way.  He allows himself to be a good person in the way that he sees it, not in the way that the world values "good people" or "kindness".

Alright, I can't wait to read your thoughts!  Sierra and I will be responding to all comments today and we're excited to get a good discussion going.  Or if you wrote your own post, you can link your thoughts!  The world is your oyster!

Loved this book club meet up!  If you are local you have to come!  

March's book is Quiet:  The power of introverts in a world that can't stop talking.  I am so excited to read this one!!!  Online book club will be Thursday, March 31 and the IRL meet up will be Tuesday, March 29.  See you there!

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Bachelor Recap Week 8: IT WAS A HARD WEEK.

Last night's episode was so hard for me to watch that I almost can't even write this post. (AMANDA IS MY FAVE) But there is so much to say! I will gather the strength to write it. 

We start our home town dates with Amanda.  The date with Amanda is in beautiful Southern California. Someone tell me why she hasn't seen her kids before meeting them on the beach?  That just seems so messed up to me. How many weeks has she gone without seeing her kids?  Six, even eight?  I would have been dying. If she's back in California why couldn't she have seen them? (Or has she already seen them and The Bachelor is just outright lying to us for entertainment's sake?) These are the questions the bachelor and never answers. 

In any case, her being reunited with her two little girls legit made me cry. I just went three days without seeing June, and I wanted to throw myself into a deep, dark pit so I can't imagine seven or eight weeks. Gosh, I just love Amanda so much. And I know it's probably not fair how much I love her. It's not that there's anything specific about her personality that I like more than the other girls, but just that I relate to her being a mom. And it seems like he's been through some serious tough shiz and has come out the other end of it not a bitter, mean person, so you gotta respect that. 

I felt the date went well in spite of the previews that The Bachelor showed that made it look like hell on earth.  Yes, your kid is going to cry in the car- spoiler alert kids hate their car seats especially if they are exhausted. 

Next we have Lauren's date in Portland. He likes her so freaking much- it is obvious every time they're together.  I don't get it and I don't like Lauren. Let the record show! There is nothing interesting about her at all. She has gotten so much screen time and still fails to entice me at all. Her family-- also boring. One look at her dad and you can tell exactly where Lauren got her looks from. He's an older hairless male version of her.  The only thing about this date that I like was when we got to see the little brothers grilling Ben about the fantasy suite in the credits. Now that's the stuff I watch The Bachelor to see!   And those sneaky boys kept a straight face the whole time! You gotta give them credit. 

Next up is Caila with the million-dollar hair. Ugh.  I still don't like her for her stupid mind game "I feel like I'm going to hurt you" crap she pulled on the last date that of course made Ben like her even more. BUT. I got to say she has one of the most interesting home town dates I have ever seen and I have seen years of The Bachelor, people.  YEARS. Season after season of The Bachelor have I watched. Obviously Caila is like a billionaire  because her dad's the CEO of a toy company... maybe I'm an 11 year old at heart, but designing my own toy house and then actually going back to the factory and making it seems like the coolest day ever to me.  Seriously.  I would be fascinated.  Greg agrees with me. That's obviously why I married him. We are two 12 year olds trapped in adults bodies.  Greg thinks Caila totally redeemed herself from her stupid "I'm going to hurt you" crap she pulled last time, which just shows what she has duped over or more than one man. (ALSO CAILA YOU CAN'T JUST MAKE OUT LIKE CRAZY ON THE FRONT LAWN.  YOUR NEIGHBORS WILL NOT LIKE YOU.)

Caila's relationship with her family is a little weird to me. Mostly because she calls her mom mommy  Also when she says "I'm afraid he's going to hurt me" and then her mom replies, "You are not going to get hurt. You are beautiful!"  The last time I checked, beauty is not an immunity for pain. I could be wrong. I'm not that beautiful. Maybe that's what I've been doing wrong my whole life?  

Next up we have a date with Jojo, but of course it starts with roses on the front porch and a long letter.   I thought it was from Ben as well, and I was like, "come on then you can't be this in love with all four girls!" Turns out it was from a guy/ ex boyfriend who only realized what he had passed up when she was on TV and turning a million heads.  That makes more sense. Ben comes over, Jojo tells him about the letter.  Ben, upon hearing that more than one man is interested in Jojo responds, "I'm not comfortable with this."  DOES ANYONE ELSE CATCH THE IRONY IN THAT?  In any case, Jojo tells Ben that it's totally over between her and the other guy and Ben rewards her with lots of kisses.

 Jojo s date is easily the least successful hometown date.  The brothers don't buy any of the bull crap. Anyone want to throw it back with me to Sean's season when Desiree's brother freaked out on Sean? This is not the first time brothers have had a serious problem with the process of The Bachelor. I did really love the what the one brother said, "you talk him up so much like he's the best guy in the world but you don't realize that you are on the same level. Don't underestimate yourself."  Or something like that.  I liked that. You can see there would be a serious psychological game going on, and I appreciated the brother's making sure Jojo knows her own worth regardless of if Ben likes her. I think that sometimes the main issue with The Bachelor is I feel like these girls do get kind of brainwashed to feel like their entire worth is dependent on whether or not this one guy likes them. So kudos to JoJo's brothers. 

Cut to the kitchen.  The grilling doesn't end.  Jojo is nowhere in sight and the brothers are just unleashing on Ben.  JoJo's mom resorts to drinking straight from the wine bottle, and the one brother stands in the back of the kitchen with his arms folded, ready at any moment to beat the crap out of them. Really! It's a lovely night!

None of the girls have told Ben yet that they love him, but they have all told us so going into the rose ceremony we know that all four girls are pretty smitten.  Jojo brings her a game with the red dress and I freaking love Amanda's dress.  I don't like Caila since her stupid mind game and Lauren is too boring for me to ever like so when he sends Amanda home I'm pretty distraught.  I wanted her to win the whole thing!   I knew she probably wouldn't... but I wanted her to!  Now I have to wonder if there's any chance in hell that she'll be the next Bachelorette. If Jojo loses I'm guessing she'll be the next Bachelorette. But if by some crazy chance she wins then Amanda might have a chance of being The Bachelorette. Lauren isn't interesting enough to carry a whole show so she's out and I don't think Caila has enough of a fan base. So maybe a 10% chance The Bachelorette could be Amanda?  One can dream!

As Ben is walking Amanda out, Amanda wants to know why Ben brought her back to LA just to dump her. A valid question but, Amanda, you do live in Orange County. Let's be honest we know you are like an hour away tops. Ben starts to cry when she goes home which gives me some kind of hope that maybe he'll bring her back, but I know it's a pipe dream.  So Greg and cry tears for the hot mom and the two little girls who don't get Ben for a step dad.  I mean, we didn't really cry.  BUT IT WAS SAD!   Here's hoping there's some amazing guy who has already sought Amanda out.

I'll be honest, I have lost a lot of my motivation for watching The Bachelor-- now that Olivia (who I love to hate) is gone and now that Amanda (who I love to love) is gone. If Jojo goes home next week I don't even know if I can rally the energy to watch the finale. Caila vs Lauren?  Just not interesting, people. 

Well.  Unless, of course, there's a toy maker.

Monday, February 22, 2016


Hi ladies and gents.  We had a busy and fun weekend which doesn't leave much time for blog posts.  I will write more after work today when everything has settled down a bit.  But for now you must know that Bon's Book Club is coming up ON THURSDAY!

We are discussing A Man Called Ove Thursday on the blog.  Read the book (or some of the book) and come back here to read mine and Sierra's thoughts on and to add your own thoughts to the comments. I always love seeing the discussion that the books prompt.

 AND if you are local come tomorrow night (Tuesday, February 23) to my home where I will be hosting an IRL book discussion with Sierra at 7:00 pm.  We did our first in person book club last month and I absolutely LOVED it.  It is so fun to meet with other bloggers and friends and talk books.  And if you are afraid of showing up somewhere where you don't know anyone completely alone, you are totally normal! That's super scary.  And intimidating.  But the group will be small and intimate and in 20 minutes you will feel like everybody is your best friend.  I know that it can be hard/ really stretch you out of your comfort zone to show up at a new place alone, but I promise you it will be worth it!

If you need to know where I live please email me at for address.  Can't wait to see you all.  And of course I will have treats because no doi.

Thursday, February 18, 2016


Listen, guys.   I know it's Thursday already, and The Bachelor was on Monday night and somehow three long days have already passed.  And I know that maybe you don't even care about The Bachelor from three nights ago.  If you're like me, your attention span doesn't allow much for waiting three days for recaps of reality tv.  Because of that, I wasn't going to write this post. I was just gonna skip the whole thing.  To start with, the episode wasn't even that interesting because all the crazy, interesting people to watch (RIP Olivia) have left us.  But last night I decided to snap a few thoughts about The Bachelor and then suddenly I had so much to say I just couldn't do not do this post. So here it is. Your 3 day old Bachelor Post.  I hate being so opinionated about such really important things like REALITY TV.

The first date of the week is Lauren. No surprise there. I just cannot hop on the Lauren train. She is so boring to me. I absolutely adore The Bachelor and watch it with the fervor of a thousand suns, but when she's on I just tune out and start looking at jewelry parts online.  Jewelry parts! I start doing work! That's how boring Lauren is. 

Half court Ronnie.  Left hand side.  Royal blue shirt.  HE IS EVERYTHING.

The one highlight of the date of course, is half shot Ronnie. Where did they find him? And how do we get him his own television show?

Although I think Lauren is super boring, I do love that they played basketball with these kids.  I have to say Ben's choice of dates (or the producers choices on his season) have been MUCH better than the dates on Kaityln's season.  Must we remember the sumo wrestling where the men were all wearing diapers?  Please have some respect for us, Kaitlyn!

After Lauren's date Jojo has a date which, I have to say, I was pretty tuned out on that one as well even though I do love Jojo. This is the time of The Bachelor that is hard for me to watch.  When it's down to five or six girls whom the bachelor all actually likes. It's just not fun anymore. It's more painful and sad. And then I just start missing my amazing cankles side plot. 

Let's see... after JoJo's date we have the last group date of the season which is always super awkward with just three girls-- Caila, Becca and Amanda.  Also they don't really do anything-- just go sit in a gazebo in the middle of a big field of grass.  (Field?)  Ever since her little mind games with Ben, Caila has driven me nuts and I've been ready for her to go home.  What is with her "I am moss, you are a tree" metaphor?  

I also am not crazy about Becca. I liked her a lot on Chris's season, and I do still like her, but it's like, come on woman, doesn't anything ever upset you? Excite you? Don't you ever want to scream with joy or anger? We did see her cry after Amanda got the group rose and that was quite the feat.  First emotion I've seen on her in two full seasons! 

Amanda gets the group date rose and gets more time with Ben  I think Ben really likes Amanda.  He was all about sharing that french fry at McDonald's with her. Also... "I've always wanted to go behind the counter of McDonald's?"  Then get a job there! That's the way to go behind the counter a lot!  I also thought it was super weird when they went to a state fair and millions of people just follow them around. I guess it is all about their bachelor nation fanbase, but how awkward is that for a real date? I'm a people person and for me that even sounds horrific.  I'm sure Amanda was thinking, "Uh... can we just go somewhere alone to make out?"

The last one on one date of the episode goes to Emily.  Oh sweet young naive innocent brave emotional beautiful crazy black eyeliner Emily.  For the record I really like Emily. I love how she stood up against Olivia, and I love how she played the goalie in soccer. I think she's funny and seems like a blast to hang out around. BUT. I have to wonder what Ben was thinking taking her of all people to meet his parents. I mean we're all thinking that right? You have five amazing beautiful mature strong women and you're going to go with a slightly crazy twin from Las Vegas?  "Look at mom and dad! This whole thing has been worth it!" 

For Emily she was sunk before it she started.  The second she got alone with that mom her mouth just erupted into a violent passion of useless nonsensical information. I am super young! But that doesn't mean I'm not ready for marriage! But I also really want to be an NFL cheerleader! I could watch movies all day long!  And I hate vegetables exclamation exclamation exclamation. I mean she would have been fine if she could have just taken it down a notch. Just stop talking!!  Also, I love how close she is to her sister. I love it when people have really close family bonds and make that a priority. But I do think it's super weird that she's never been without her twin. She never had a job without her? Never going to school without her? Never have any friends with her? That's way too co-dependent for me, and I would guess it would be a pretty big red flag for any suitor.

 And it is. For Ben at least.  That's why it's not a surprise when he takes her off on his private boat from his private dock and delivers her back to the house with the girls.   Ben says goodbye.  And Emily doesn't seem too heartbroken.  I mean, she's sad of course because she's supposed to be.... but homegirl will be just fine. After all she has an NFL cheerleading career to get ready for. All the girls start bawling hysterically when they find out Emily is going home.  This remains the most interesting part of the whole episode?  Why so sad?  Why so many tears?  Turns out Emily is just a really fun person to have around!

There is no cocktail party this episode nobody knows why. Becca gets the boot. Everybody is shocked.  Well... we'reshocked that she's going home this soon but not shocked that she didn't win. At this point I feel pretty sure that Lauren is got first place on lockdown. But who knows? I hope I'm wrong!  Anyway Becca is upset and laments on the way home that her relationships keep not working out. My suggestion to you, gorgeous Becca. Try to find your next boyfriend somewhere other than a reality tv show where one girl out of the 25 wins. Statistically your odds are much better.

And that's a wrap!  Are you all excited for hometowns or what?  Looks like it's going to be LOTS OF DRAMA!!!

Monday, February 15, 2016

Snapchat: The Purest Form of Social Media?

I've been meaning (and promising to you all) to write this post for awhile.  This afternoon, while my sick husband and baby sleep and the house is quiet, I shall finally and everlastingly declare to you my love for snapchat.

I feel like I was relatively late to hop on to the snapchat band wagon. (Username @thelifeofbon) This is because social media overwhelms me.  Sometimes my blog overwhelms me.  (Sorry guys).  Sometimes (a lot of times) I'm mad at whatever social media gods made all these dumb rules for social media that we all are supposed to follow or else no one will like us.   That's why I didn't want to get snapchat.  I felt like I was already up to my ears in instagram promotions, facebook posts, amazingly funny twitter one-liners- I just couldn't handle any more of that cray social media pressure.

A couple of friends (like Aubrey) kept telling me that I would really enjoy using snapchat- that it was a lot more fun than other social media.  In November there was a religious announcement that greatly affected people in the state where I live and facebook became an ugly, negative space in reaction to that.  I understand people are free to post whatever they want, but I felt myself being so dragged down every time I opened facebook.

So I took a facebook break and turned to snapchat instead.  I followed only a few people who I know.  I didn't post anything.  Instead I just watched my friends.  I watched their little videos, their funny pictures.  I liked it.  It felt light and fun, the way I have always envisioned social media to be.  I was happy looking at videos of gurgling babies.  I liked hearing my friends say nonsense, not worried about how they looked or how many people were going to like their ramblings.  I really liked it when my friends made ugly faces and did weird voices and made themselves look like fools.  Hey!  People like me!

SO... I started doing my own snaps.  It took me a few weeks to get the hang of it and then it took me a few months to realize I was still on private settings (thanks Tara!) but now I feel like I can truly embrace snapchat in all its glory.

What is so great about snapchat you ask?  I shall tell you!


1.  No one acts like they are smarter than you all the time.  We all do this on facebook, even if we do it unknowingly.  I feel like there is such a strong implication of "this is how I feel and everyone who feels differently is an idiot" on facebook.  It starts to wear on you, you know.  On snapchat there is this common understanding that we are all idiots.  It's great!

2.  No political nonsense.  Yes, we are all super screwed if Trump wins the election!  But I am soooooooo tired of hearing about it.  And we've still got nine months to go.  I haven't ever loved talking politics.  I think it's important to be aware of the issues and advocate change on the issues that are important to you... but facebook is just not the way to do it imho.  It becomes a hotbed for political standoffs and no one ever wins.  I have read so many negative threads and horrible things being said about each other because people don't see eye to eye.  I just can't handle the negativity of facebook anymore.  Guess what, though?  I've been on snapchat for months and haven't listened to one political rant.  No one has tried to tell me who to vote for.  No one has told me how stupid the other candidates that they don't support are.  It's a snapchat miracle!

3.  No religious mumbo jumbo.  I think you all know I'm Mormon and I live in a Mormon state.  But there are also a lot of people in this state who aren't Mormon, used to be Mormon, hate Mormons, etc.  Lately the LDS church (aka Mormons) has made some decisions that not everyone agrees with.  Watching my facebook feed blow up over this and seeing so many hurtful things coming from both sides made me want to leave facebook and never return.  It just becomes this black hole of negativity that you can never escape.  Snapchat is filled with funny short videos and moms kissing their babies and people showing off all the donuts they have eaten that night.  What a wonderful place to be!

4.  No constant articles clogging up my feed.  I love me an interesting article to read on the internet.  Heck, I post my own blog posts to facebook all the time  (this may have been how you found my post today). But I am the first to admit that all the posts on articles on my feed get tiresome.  I feel like it's all anyone posts.  It's like facebook is just this place where we post an article that said something we like and that's it.  I want to know about people's lives and families and the funny thing the grocer said to them today.  NOT 12 ways to start your morning productively.  Snachat contains no articles!  Ever!  If I want to read an article, I must search it our on facebook but snapchat stays pure to its roots.

5.  No drama!  I have been listening to "So You've Been Publicly Shamed" while I drive to my work and it has been really interesting to hear studies of the effects of social media.  One quote that stuck with me, "With social media we've created a stage for constant artificial high drama."  AMEN!  Doesn't it feel like everyone is always upset on social media?


1.  No Likes!  This one might be my favorite.  I get so stressed about how many people like my instagram pictures.  And I get nervous about how many people are following me, and am I keeping up with my blogging friends and AM I COOL ENOUGH DOES ANYONE LIKE ME!?!?!?!  This is what instagram feels like all the time to me.  It is just terrible to be me on instagram I promise you.  The instagram-like anxiety is real.  On snapchat there are no likes.  You can see who has viewed your pictures or videos, but that's it.  There are also no comments.  You just put your stuff out into space and if someone doesn't like it or doesn't like you, you are none the wiser. Ignorance is truly bliss!

2.  You don't have to take pretty pictures on snapchat.  I am not very creative with pictures.  I have always thought it was the worst part of having a blog.  My pictures never look pretty.  I can recognize an amazing instagram picture when I see one, but I just suck at recreating them.  And then when I try I just feel like a dumb sheep follower who everyone will know is trying too hard.  White backgrounds, pops of color, perfect brick wall.  I SUCK AT IT!  Even now I am stressing about what pictures I am going to add to this blog post because I know you all want a picture.  Snapchat pictures don't have to be pretty!  In fact, they rarely are!  Most of the time they are quite ugly, but almost always funny.

3.  No staged photos.  Similar to point #2-  snapchat just feels so much more authentic than instagram because nothing is staged.  You're looking at your ugly feet in the super market- POST IT!  No one cares.  You post that crap on instagram and everyone will hate you forever.  (Not really.)  (But really).  Snapchat pictures have to be taken within the snapchat app and then they have to be posted right away so there is no editing, no staging, no making your life look 100 xs better than it is.  IT IS A DREAM COME TRUE!

4.  No sales!  I am not saying I hate facebook and instagram because of sales.  I run a large part of my promotions and marketing for our jewelry shop through instagram.  I'm very grateful for instagram because of this.  BUT.  It does feel nice to come to a social media space where you know you won't be bombarded with ads or sales or buy this or buy that.  It feels so pure and unpolluted.  Snapchat hasn't monetized yet (although I am guessing that will happen fairly soon) so it just feels like you're hanging with your friends.  Like someone actually respects me, you know?

5.  Snapchat is not user friendly.  At all.  In fact, it's actually kind of hard to figure out what is going on.  And there's a bunch of secret stuff that you can do but isn't obvious at all.  Reminds me of all the secrets on Mario- extra lives, secret levels, etc.  Only the die hards can understand!   I like this because it doesn't feel like snapchat is going to get overtaken by my bishop's wife or my great aunt, you know?  It's nice to have a social media outlet that sticks to people of your same age/ cohort.  You feel me?  I don't have to worry that my boss will finally realize how ridiculous I actually am.  And if you do post something totally self incriminating, it is gone in 24 hours!  Nothing is permanent on snapchat!

If you have decided to join in on the snapchat awesomeness, you can find me on snapchat @thelifeofbon.  Greg is also on snapchat @greghlarsen.  He mostly makes videos about dolls pretending to murder him.  My husband, ladies and gentleman.

That's a wrap from the Larsen clan.  Peace!

Thursday, February 11, 2016

Today we Valentined

Today at 4:00 I had ten 8-11 year old girls at my house--- beating down the door, chasing Maverick around, trying to win June's heart.  They came because I invited them.  I think.

As part of my church group twice a month I get together with this gaggle of girls and a couple other adults to do some kind of activity.  It's basically the equivalent of cub scouts but no crummy merit badges required.

Today our activity was to decorate sugar cookies, make cards, and take them to people who we thought might be lonely or just need a little extra love this Valentine's Day.  I was a little scared to attempt this activity because 1) sugar cookies are a ton work 2) 8 year olds are not exactly notorious for being able to frost sugar cookies and 3) we only had an hour to do all this in. It was just all so ambitious.  I kept trying to think of an easier activity to do for today but my heart kept coming back to this one.  Fine, you win stupid heart.

That meant that this morning I was up with June making dough and this afternoon found us rolling out sheet after sheet of heart shaped sugar cookies.  The girls arrived in typical energetic fashion right on time and in a moment my house was a wild zoo.  That's the thing about eight year olds.  No one arrives fashionably late.

Before we decorated the cookies and made the cards we sat down for a second so we could have a three minute "lesson".  I was so touched by how sweet the girls were when I told them the purpose of the activity today.  I talked about how holidays are awesome and fun, yes, but sometimes they can be kind of hard or painful for some people.  "Why do you think that is?"  I asked.

One girl raised her hand,

"Maybe they don't have a lot of family or friends close by so they feel kind of lonely."


Another girl wanted a chance to speak,

"Maybe they recently had someone in their family die and that holiday meant a lot with that person.  So now that that person is gone the holiday doesn't feel the same and it is sad for them."

I was pretty floored at these girls' responses.  Sometimes I think our whole world is going straight down the tube, but then I listen to 8 year olds and they've got it all figured out so maybe there's hope for us after all.

Next it was decorating (too much frosting!  too little frosting!) and sprinkling (woah!  don't put the whole can of sprinkles on one cookie!) and card making (how do you spell Valentine's?)  I was so freaking touched by the girls' cards.  One girl wrote, 

I love you!
I love you!

Happy Valentine's Day.  I'm going to say it one more time--- I love you!

Sheesh.  Eight year olds, man.

Cookie plates and love notes ready to go.

Last but not least was our doorbell ditching effort.  The girls were SOOOO stoked to doorbell ditch.  It was adorable.  Like you could see the adrenaline just coursing through their little veins.  We hid behind cars and garbage cans while girls went up to doors and dropped off the cookies and cards.  We hit up some single moms in our neighborhood, a widower, and people we know who live alone.  It was so sweet to see how stinking excited the girls got about it.  They tiptoed up to the doorsteps, left their goodies, and then sprinted like mad to make sure no one caught them in the act.

The day was crazy exhausting (never do sugar cookies!  chocolate chip cookies ftw) but it felt good to help those girls think about others who might need a little lift.  Well.  I don't really think it was so much me reminding them, but them reminding me.   Eight year old girls got the world figured out, I'm convinced.  

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Bachelor Recap: Week 6. In which there are pigs

I can hardly wait to write this bachelor recap.  My fingers are dying to get on the keyboard to just hammer this thing out.  So much to talk about!

We start off the week with our cliffhanger from last week.  Ben has asked to talk to Olivia right before the rose ceremony.  SHOCK!  Will he take her rose away and send her home on the spot?  One can dream!

Ben asks Olivia if the rumors he's been hearing our true that she's basically a total b*tch.  In typical Bachelor contestant style, she claims the problem is them- not her.  She doesn't fit in with the other girls because "I like reading in my room and thinking" while the other girls are so simple to enjoy something totally stupid like painting their nails.

I mean, I think we all like to sit around and think, right?

It works for now and Ben lets her stay.  He sends Jennifer home which forces us to consider "Who's Jennifer?"

Now, on to this week's dates!  The girls are headed to the Bahamas.  Wahoo!


Caila gets the first one on one date which is a total shock to everyone because GASP she already had a one on one date!  Doesn't Ben know that every girl is supposed to get her turn before the dates start over?  Leah, who has only had group dates up until this point, is especially mad.  She unleashes a potty mouth the likes of which we've never seen on the Bachelor before.  While Caila is catching the biggest fish known to man on her date with Ben (and no, that fish is not Ben) (and yes she literally was catching the biggest fish ever) (and that seriously looks like the coolest thing ever I want to do it too!) it cuts to Leah crying because she hasn't had one on one time yet.  Caila and Ben kiss, Leah cries.  You gotta give the Bachelor editing team credit, they sure know how to spin a sad story.

At dinner Ben asks Caila to open up and be vulnerable with him and she replies that she's not ready yet and then starts throwing out the craziest Bachelor convo I have ever seen.  She says she doesn't know what to do because she's afraid she's going to break Ben's heart but that she thinks she loves him but that "It feels like I'm going to hurt you."  It is all absolutely insane. Ben LOVES it and gives Caila the rose.  Whoever said men weren't complicated never saw a date like this one before.

Back home the date card has arrived for the group date.  The girls notice only two names are left off- Olivia and Emily.  This means Olivia and Emily will go on the infamous two on one date.  Olivia, in classic confident fashion, is not scared of her competition"

"She's young.  She's like a bird.  I don't even give a f***."

Now would be a good time to note that Olivia and Emily are the same age- a ripe old 23.


Really, this is the greatest thing about this entire episode, probably the entire season, and maybe even the entire history of Bachelor watching.  Instead of just swimming or sailing as they often do on their dates, the girls are to feed hot dogs to pigs who are swimming at the beach.  HOT DOGS TO PIGS.  I hope you see the irony.

I've never seen anything like this on Bachelor history and really I could not be more pleased.  It is an absolute hot mess.  At first when I saw the preview and all the girls were screaming I was like, "Oh, come on girls, get a grip."  Then I saw the real thing and I tell you, I'd be screaming too!  The pigs are super aggressive and are pretty much bowling over the women to get themselves a piece of hot dog.  They are huge pigs who could easily knock a girl out and will stop at nothing for a little piece of that weenie dog.  It's pure madness I tell you.  Pigs chasing women at full speed for a piece of meat. The Bachelor producers have really rewarded us this time!  Jojo put it best:

"It's like a bar in Dallas.  There are pigs everywhere."

Don't go to bars in Dallas:  duly noted.

Leah is still butt hurt because she didn't get a one on one date and is having a hard time making the best of the date.  Lauren H. encourages her to talk to Ben about it and when she does Ben basically says "deal with it" but in nicer terms.  He asks her to make the best of the time she does have with him and later she laments that now everything is worse than before.  Either tons of that conversation got edited out or I just truly do not understand Leah.

That night Ben realizes he may have effed up by giving so much individual attention to Lauren B. earlier in the day.  Everyone can tell that Ben likes Lauren the most and it hurts their feelings.  So to make up for it, Ben spends his night time telling every single girl how much he likes her.  This can't possibly backfire on him.

Leah has decided to follow Ben's advice of "making the best of the time she has with Ben" by telling him that Lauren B. is not the best girl for him.  During their one on one time she states that there is one person  who acts very differently around him than the girls in the house and who she really doesn't think he should be in to...

"I don't want to say any names, but... Lauren B."

NOW.  Greg and I watched this part over and over (because this is the kind of people we are.  We have no dignity.)  and I can say with certainty that the Lauren B. part was dubbed over.  It doesn't show Leah's mouth when she is saying it so maybe she didn't really say Lauren's name.  In any case, it's a pretty stupid move and bachelor girls never learn.  Bachelor Lessons 101- the best way to win a man's heart is by constantly talking trash about all the women around you.  Oh wait.  That never works.

Ben is frustrated and has time with Lauren B. next.  Lauren B. is super vanilla and super boring, I have said that from the get go.  BUT I don't think she's a mean or manipulative or dishonest person as Leah would have us believe.  Lauren B. is super confused when Ben asks her about it, the whole night is weird.

When all the girls are together again Lauren is in tears.  Leah asks "oh, what happened?  You're sad?  I can't possibly imagine why!" and we all agree that she's the worst.  Maybe just as bad as Olivia?  Leah lies outright and says she didn't say anything to Ben.  The girls seem to see through her lie.

Group date ends and I can't even remember who got the rose- it all seems to be overshadowed by the Leah-Lauren B. debacle.  Back at the house, Amanda, Emily and Lauren try to figure out who would have ratted on Lauren.  Leah, meanwhile, is crying a lot because she has lost her chance with Ben.  She rallies energy to give it one more honest effort.  She decides to go over to Ben's house to bond with him and work on their relationship.  Or to talk more trash on Lauren.  Whatever.  Either way it's bound to secure Ben's heart.

Ben seems genuinely excited that Leah has made the effort to come over.  He pours her a drink, sits down comfortably with her on the couch, and she doesn't waste any time getting right to the reason why she came over.  Lauren B.

Is anyone else as confused as I am on Leah's strategy?  I just don't get these girls sometimes.  I swear it is not that hard to get a guy to like you.  Flirt.  Be sweet.  Laugh when they say funny or clever things.  Tell them they look good. Don't talk about other girls.

The plan totally backfires and Ben sends Leah home right there on the spot.  Wow.  Harsh, Ben, but I respect it.


The girls are shown preparing for their date.  Olivia is excited as can be because to her it's just a "one on one date".  It does not occur to her at all that Ben might not feel as strongly for her as she does for him.  I mean, she could at least act a little frustrated that she's getting a 2-on-1, but that's not Olivia's style.  Emily certainly doesn't hide her fear.

The two on one date finds us on a boat and then on the beach.  Olivia is certain they have a strong love that others have never even dreamed of.

"What I feel for Ben is all consuming, ever present love."

In other words, she's totally delusional.

Olivia claims her focus is always on Ben.  And by Ben, she clearly means herself.  Any time they have alone time together, Olivia talks about herself.  Like when she tells Ben that she is a deep, intellectual human being who is well grounded.  If that doesn't make him fall head over heels in love with her, what will people?  WHAT WILL?

Emily tells Ben that she likes him a lot and wants to see where their relationship will go.  Wisely, she does not spend the bulk of her time trashing on Olivia.  I guess she thinks Ben can figure out that mess out on his own.

Ben takes the rose and then takes Olivia away from Emily to tell Olivia that she is going home.  Naturally we are all left to wonder why Ben took that rose with him.  Producers.  Producers. Producers. Bachelor producers are the worst, that's all you need to know.  Ben goes back and gives Emily the rose while Olivia watches on from the distance.  I don't like Olivia at all, but it's a little painful even for me.  Why are the producers such horrible people?  Because they are here to make great television, and that's the truth.


Ben gives a giant "I am tired of all of your nonsense" to the girls when he decides to cancel the rose ceremony.  Lauren H. gets the boot, which is a little surprising, but not shocking.  All the girls at this point (except for Emily) are pretty strong contenders.

At this point I am rooting for Amanda to win and Jojo to be the next Bachelor.  I do think Jojo is the most aware of other people's feelings.  At one point she says "I'm excited to see Ben so I can validate him" not "I'm excited to see Ben so he can validate me."  To me that's a key difference as most Bachelor women seem constantly obsessed with being validated by the lead of the show.  Jojo seems to get that it's not all about her which would make a great Bachelorette.  She's the only one of the bunch who has the personality and the toughness to be a Bachelorette imho.

I want Amanda to win because she's adorable and has two little girls and I am such a sucker for that.  I am still thinking that Lauren wins which is disappointing considering her total boringness, but whatever, I'm pretty much resigned to it now.  Caila used to be my favorite but she's now my least favorite due to her stupid mind games/ "I-love-you-but-feel-like-I'm-going-to-hurt-you" nonsense.


1.  Lauren B.
2.  Amanda
3.  Jojo
4.  Becca
5.  Caila