I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY BUT FIRST WE MUST TALK ABOUT THE BACHELORETTE!

19 year old tan Bonnie.  

This person no longer exists.

It's 11:48 pm and I really have no business writing a blog post right now.  Today was a crazy day start to finish- the last real day of class being held- and if I had half a brain I would curl up in bed and give myself some much needed rest.  But I feel like I've been neglecting my little blog space and tonight I just really needed to come to write and to give this space love, both for my blog and for me.  Like any relationship, my relationship with my blog is complicated and is rife with ups and downs.  Sometimes I can't stand the thought of having to deal with my blog while other days I absolutely crave it-  a necessary release from all the pressure and stress around me.  Today I have craved that time alone with my blog, and so, that is how I find myself at 11:48 at this space.

I have a lot of things I want to tell you all about but I feel like each one is a blog post in and of myself.  For example:

• I found this great budgeting app that is kind of changing the way I spend and think about my money!  Could this be the answer to all my budgeting woes?  
• I had an interesting and insightful conversation today with my principal about classroom content, education, why we do what we do.  WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF EDUCATION? we sat and pondered.  But seriously.  What is the point of  all this?  Why do we go to school?  Why do we teach?  Surely there is some greater meaning than facts, stats, dates.
• I am coming along in the progress of my little back yard.   I'll be!  I'm actually making a little utopia for us out there.  I can't wait to show you.  And to get all your tips on gardening in pots and keeping grass green and healthy.  It's so fun to have a little outdoor space of your own.
• Greg and I have certainly been through our ups and downs, and this year has tried us in ways that we've never experienced.  But the last few weeks I have felt such an overwhelming gratitude for him and a sweetness in our relationship.  Our life is not what either of us expected, but I think there is a lot of power that comes from letting go of all those expectations, from surrendering that which no longer serves you.
• School is officially done on Friday!  I've really enjoyed teaching my classes this year, and especially the last few weeks of school once the testing circus was over.  We studied one of my favorite books, The Things They Carried.  Can't wait to tell you what we've been doing!
• With summer fast approaching and Greg and I both off of work, I am wanting to explore the great state of Utah and take lots of mini road trips.  As a child I loved goblin valley, Moab, and Zions- although admittedly it's been years since I've been to any of those places.  What are your favorite Utah destination spots?  We are ready to get our camp/hike/explore on.
• Did you all see the Bachelorette Monday night?  Given the history of The Bachelorette, I am shocked that I am shocked, but seriously.  I'M SHOCKED. 

See.  I told you I could write a whole blog post on any one of those subjects.  Tell me which ones are most interesting to you and those are the blog posts you shall read first!  Ask and ye shall receive!

For no other reason than timeliness, we shall discuss The Bachelorette for today's post.  What did you all think of last night's episode?  I wrote down a million funny quotes while I was watching it and then promptly lost the paper that I was writing on.  Last week of school people, last week of school.   Here is what my brain is still holding on to, though:

I am invested in this.  That's why I left my business, my dog, my bonsai trees- all the things in the world that I love.
- Tony the healer.  Glad to see the trees made the list.

I have the eyes of a child, the heart of a warrior, and the soul of the gypsy.
-In other words, the healer thinks very highly of myself.

Every month the lining of your uterus is going to shed.
-Idaho boy giving the best explanation of a period you have ever heard.  Or the worst?

He is the largest Japanese human being alive.
-Chris Harrison explaining the "accomplishments" of the sumo wrestlers.

Some thoughts:
- While I know that Tony is a bit extreme and definitely not a good fit for Kaitlyn, I do agree with his frustration over the dates.  Why are they all so competitive?  Why is every date pitting the boys up against each other to see who can win?  The boxing and the sumo wrestling, especially.  I feel like it is embarrassing and degrading to the men, and to steal a word from Tony, primal.  This is the most we expect out of our men to woo a woman?  I get that Kaitlyn wants to have a good time and see who can just have fun and roll with it, but blech.  Does anyone know how much say she has in the dates?  I feel like this is something that would have been written about in Bachelor memoirs, which sadly I have not read.  (Obviously, given my fascination and love for all things Bachelor I need to make that more of a priority in my life.)

- I really like a lot of Kaitlyn's guys.  At this point I do feel like it's hard to really see a front runner
because she seems so in to all of them.  My favorites right now are Josh (Idaho Boy), Shawn (Ryan Gosling look alike), both Bens, Jared, and Dentist.  I feel like she could fall hard for any one of those guys.  I don't think Kaitlyn's problem will be finding a guy she loves, I think it will be finding just one she loves.

DON'T TELL ME THIS MAN DOESN'T LOOK LIKE RYAN GOSLING.

- The fake sex ed class was just too good.  Nothing like embarrassing the crap out of your suitors!  (No, but seriously.)  My favorite was Josh, Idaho boy.  If I were on my phone this is where I would insert a million heart eyed emojis.  I said it last week, but if I were Kaitlyn the competition would be over already.  Josh, you won, you're coming home with me now, you awkard cutie.

- The Clint/JJ thing.  Definitely something we've never seen on Bachelorette.  The question for me is, is any of it real?  Does Clint really have feelings for JJ?  And was he really playing Kaitlyn that hard?  Or is this all contrived nonsense from the producers?  Are those two actors, hired to stir up ratings and controversy? (It's working!).  I don't know what I think about any of it except for that the conversation they had in the hot tub where they both declared their love for turtles was just beyond awesome. I like turtles too!  Can I join your bromance?

Alright, I think I have emptied my brain of all its Bachelor nonsense.  This is the part where you tell me all your thoughts about The Bachelorette, fake sex ed classes on tv, and everything else that is important and valuable in this world.