If I were a boy, yo!

Blogging geniuses Erin and Gay have come up with the genius idea to write on the topic, "If I were a boy..."  Little did they know this has been on my mind for years now and I've got more to say than they are going to know what to do with!

IF I WERE A BOY....

I would never get uber emotional and break into tears for no apparent reason.  I'd have control of my emotions, dang it!

I would take the trash out every day and do the dishes because I know how that turns a woman on.

I'd have a hair cut like Jef Holm's.  So beautiful.

I would have five minutes of laughing time every day where I remembered that I never have to push another person out of me and I never have to have monthly cramps.  MWAHAHAHA!  Women are such suckers!

I'd pee wherever and whenever I felt like.

I would watch The Bachelor every week for no other reason than it would make me a total ladies man, I would get invited to all the girls only Bachelor parties, and I would always have something to talk to the chicks about.

I'd be really tall like my brothers.  All my brothers are over six feet tall and I'm a mere 5 foot 4.  Now that ain't fair!

I'd try out for NBA basketball.  See above.  Tallness.

I would try to come up with clever ways to make girls pay for their own dates.  I'd make bets with them that were guarantee wins for me.  I'd never have to pay for a date!

I probably wouldn't be a teacher.  :(  Instead I would be a professional sky diver!

Every time girls complained about their period or the pains of feeling like your whole insides are going to explode every month  I would say, "Gross.  No one wants to hear about that.  Please.  Be classy."

I would pick up hitch hikers all the time.  No threat there!  Also, I would hitch hike myself.  All over the freaking country.

I would carry a gun around with me just to feel more hardcore.

I would never ever ever have to go grocery shopping again.  I'd make the woman do it!  Oh, it is good to be a man!

I'd have really big muscles.  Obvi.

Wow!  Who would have thought I would enjoy being a boy so darn much?  If I ever get reincarnated I know what gender I'm choosing!

Now, before I sign off I want to live you with a special little Valentines Day treat.  And something to get us through the rest of January.  Goodness, does this month ever end?

Ashley from the Shine Project emailed me and said, "Hey!  You want some bracelets?"  And I said "You bet I do!"  She zipped them over to me in the mail and I haven't taken them off since.  I have so much respect for Ashley and what she does.  Her jewelry is made by at risk youth seeking empowerment and to break the cycle.  They make the jewelry and are paid for it- the money enabling them to go to school and find opportunities they would never have otherwise.

Pretty inspiring, huh?  Not to mention that the jewelry they make is seriously breath taking.

It stands for Bonnie loves Greg, not Boy loves Girl as Hubs originally thought.  Silly boy.

For Valentine's Day, Ashley is giving away a custom Threads bracelet, just like the above beauty I'm sporting.  Your initial + heart + your lover's initial.  No lover?  Just slap your own initial on there!

Mandatory:  1. Follow Life of Bon and 2.  Check out the Thread shop and leave a comment saying which bracelet is your fave.

Also, because they are awesome, Ashley and her peeps are doing a little Valentine's Day special for you readers- buy two bracelets get one free.  Enter code "Valentines" at check out.  I think it's time we all go buy OURSELVES a little Valentine's Day treat.  Am I right, or am I right?

P.S.  Welcome Saturated Canary readers!  I sure hope you'll stick around.  Check out the Best of Bon if you're still not sure!

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