The Life of Bon: Happy Post April day, you fools!

Tuesday, April 01, 2014

Happy Post April day, you fools!

Well, folks the sun is setting on another glorious April Fool's.

My main prank was on my junior class.  They deserved it.  They all took the ACT the first week of March so I told them that there was a glitch in the scores and none of the scores they received back were correct.  They would all have to retake the test a week from today, April 8.

They took the bait hook line and sinker.  Naturally, they all freaked out.  There was about two minutes of just raw panic in the room.  Ah, puddy in my hands, the young tikes.

Greg is tricky to get for April Fool's Day.  You see, when we got married there were a few "conditions."  A kind of pre-nup, if you will.  One of the conditions of our marriage was that I do not play April Fool's pranks on him.  I reluctantly agreed to his condition if he would satisfy my condition that we would go on a vacation every year.  He said yes.  You win some you lose some I guess.

Little does Greg know that I get him every year.  You see, every April Fool's Day I tell him that I am going to get him, and that I have a prank planned.  He then spends the entire day in paranoia of what may be coming.  He's convinced that a horrible prank lies in wait around each and every corner.  I never have anything planned, but he worries about it all day anyway.  Easiest prank ever.

Also I feel like now would be a good time to brag that my brother got on the radio this morning by recounting all of the April Fool's days tricks I've ever done on him.  Now THAT, my friends, is how you know you've really made a difference with your life.  (For a whole history of the April Fools madness check out this post.)

(Also, since I have married Greg I have been laying low on my April Fools pranks.  Part of it is due to his hatred for the day.  The other part is because I am trying to lull him and everyone close to me into a false sense of security.  And of course, I'm building my army- give me ten years and I'll have a gang full of kids whom I will train in my prankster ways.)

Now, on a separate (and much nicer) note, I have Erin here for you to tell you all what men are thinking when they are at Target.  Erin has posted for me a few times on this blog and she always totally nails it.  I found myself nodding in agreement to almost all of the reasons below as to why men HATE Target.  Brilliant!


I'm Erin and I blog over at Love, The Campbells where I write about family, recipes, life, love, our new baby girl and all things in between.  But I'm not here to talk about any of those things today.  I'm here to talk about Target because, let's be honest, that store is every woman's dream come true and every man's nightmare.

After reading Taylor's post a few weeks ago of Inside a Woman's Mind at Target, I got to thinking about how it's like for men at Target, specifically my husband.  Here are a few reasons why my husband hates Target.  Although I'm sure this list could go on much MUCH longer.

1)  The minute I walk in the store, I fall into a trance.  I hear nothing the man says, avoid him steering me clear of select aisles (namely the $1 section) and purposely loose him in the store so I can get lost in all the Target glory.
2)  Like most women I know, I have a routine when I go to Target.  There are departments that must be seen on every visit, even if I know absolutely nothing has changed.  These areas include the book section, the office supplies, and shampoo/lotion aisles.  This gets old quick for him.  And he pitches a fit every time I go to these aisles.  But alas, they are a Target requirement.
3)  Ever so often, Target partners up with big names or carries limited editions of certain things like the Neiman Marcus collection or the Oh Joy! party collection.  The day I gave birth the Peter Pilotto collection came out; two days later I bought a bikini.  Why?  Duh...because it was a Target limited edition!  I wouldn't be caught dead in a bikini though right now.  Hopefully by summer.  Later summer.  Of 2015.
4)  I go there for travel size toothpaste and shampoo for a trip and come out with toothpaste, shampoo, a new toothbrush, colorful pens, a new notebook, a big purse to use as a carry on, some snacks for the trip, two new books, a cd (cd's always look more appealing in that store than they do when you get them home), a $50+ receipt and a giant smile on my stupid face.  Only to be greeted with another disappointed look on my husband's face.
5)  This happens.  Need I explain more?


To see 15 more reasons why my husband hates Target, stop by my blog!  I'd love to see your pretty faces there!

3 comments:

  1. ahahah...that might be the best prank ever. the prank of fear and paranoia. :)

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  2. hahaha you are a funny one getting your students!! And so sad that you can't play pranks on Greg. I love April Fool's!

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  3. Been meaning to thank you for the Craigslist gag. I used it this year and it was phenomenal. Thank you, thank you.

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