Setting:
6:00. Wednesday.
Our apartment.
It is dinner hour, the couple is seated and eating something that really doesn't look very good. Bonnie cooked it.
Bonnie: So I got a ticket today.
Greg: What? Bonnie are you serious?
Bonnie: Yes. I got pulled me over for an illegal left turn.
Greg: Bon....
Bonnie: I know, but it wasn't too bad because he didn't actually give me the ticket for that so it's not a moving violation.
Greg: What'd you get a ticket for then?
Bonnie: Not wearing my seat belt.
Greg: Bonnie you weren't wearing your seat belt?! How many times have I begged you to wear it?
Bonnie: In my defen-
Greg: No. There is no defense. You should always be wearing your seat belt.
Bonnie: But I was literally pulling out of the school's parking lot. I hadn't had time!
Greg: I don't care. You put it on before you start the car.
Bonnie: Sheesh, stop being so dramatic. Also you know I've gotten way better about wearing my seat belt, I wear it probably 90% of the time. That stupid beeper in my car makes sure I put it on.
Greg: Then why weren't you wearing it today?
Bonnie: I had seriously just gotten in the car! The beeper hadn't even gone yet.
Greg: There's no way that's true.
Bonnie: Okay, you're right. It's not. The beeper had gone off, but I really had only been in the car a minute.
Greg: How much is the ticket?
Bonnie: It's not bad at all, it's only like probably around $25.
Greg: There's no way that's true.
Bonnie: Dang it! How do you know every time!
Greg: Because you're a terrible liar. So how much is it really?
Bonnie: Forty bucks.
Greg: For real?
Bonnie: Yes, for real.
Greg: So your only ticket is that $40 one, then?
Bonnie: Well, I also got a ticket for no proof of insurance and no license on me but those can be erased if I just go down to the court and show them proof of both.
Greg: So it's three tickets?
Bonnie: Technically, yes. Although none of the tickets are for what I was pulled over for.
Greg: I give up.
In summation, it's not easy to be married to a forgetful wreck of a driver like myself. Also I really am not a compulsive liar, I just like to minimize damage if possible. And I really am getting better with the seat belt thing. Growing up, seat belts weren't really emphasized too much in my family, so I grew into a bad, bad habit of never wearing it. I really am mostly better about wearing it now, (Greg's a seat belt Nazi.) it's just not automatic. Also, the whole thing sounds quite comical written out, but the actual getting pulled over part was awful. I started crying in front of the officer because it had just been one of those days already and because cops always make me frazzled. Especially when he asks for license, registration and insurance and I have a copy of none of those in my car.
It's hard to be such a mess, really.
6:00. Wednesday.
Our apartment.
It is dinner hour, the couple is seated and eating something that really doesn't look very good. Bonnie cooked it.
Bonnie: So I got a ticket today.
Greg: What? Bonnie are you serious?
Bonnie: Yes. I got pulled me over for an illegal left turn.
Greg: Bon....
Bonnie: I know, but it wasn't too bad because he didn't actually give me the ticket for that so it's not a moving violation.
Greg: What'd you get a ticket for then?
Bonnie: Not wearing my seat belt.
Greg: Bonnie you weren't wearing your seat belt?! How many times have I begged you to wear it?
Bonnie: In my defen-
Greg: No. There is no defense. You should always be wearing your seat belt.
Bonnie: But I was literally pulling out of the school's parking lot. I hadn't had time!
Greg: I don't care. You put it on before you start the car.
Bonnie: Sheesh, stop being so dramatic. Also you know I've gotten way better about wearing my seat belt, I wear it probably 90% of the time. That stupid beeper in my car makes sure I put it on.
Greg: Then why weren't you wearing it today?
Bonnie: I had seriously just gotten in the car! The beeper hadn't even gone yet.
Greg: There's no way that's true.
Bonnie: Okay, you're right. It's not. The beeper had gone off, but I really had only been in the car a minute.
Greg: How much is the ticket?
Bonnie: It's not bad at all, it's only like probably around $25.
Greg: There's no way that's true.
Bonnie: Dang it! How do you know every time!
Greg: Because you're a terrible liar. So how much is it really?
Bonnie: Forty bucks.
Greg: For real?
Bonnie: Yes, for real.
Greg: So your only ticket is that $40 one, then?
Bonnie: Well, I also got a ticket for no proof of insurance and no license on me but those can be erased if I just go down to the court and show them proof of both.
Greg: So it's three tickets?
Bonnie: Technically, yes. Although none of the tickets are for what I was pulled over for.
Greg: I give up.
In summation, it's not easy to be married to a forgetful wreck of a driver like myself. Also I really am not a compulsive liar, I just like to minimize damage if possible. And I really am getting better with the seat belt thing. Growing up, seat belts weren't really emphasized too much in my family, so I grew into a bad, bad habit of never wearing it. I really am mostly better about wearing it now, (Greg's a seat belt Nazi.) it's just not automatic. Also, the whole thing sounds quite comical written out, but the actual getting pulled over part was awful. I started crying in front of the officer because it had just been one of those days already and because cops always make me frazzled. Especially when he asks for license, registration and insurance and I have a copy of none of those in my car.
It's hard to be such a mess, really.
I lost the physical copy of my license like six months ago. I have the number memorized though and always have my military ID on me so when I can spout off the number when I'm asked and have photo proof that I am who I say I am.
ReplyDeleteI once got pulled over for speeding and the cop remembered me 2 years later because I was the nicest person he had ever pulled over. :D
I've gotten pulled over three times, all for such weird reasons. Policemen/women always seem to freak me out too, even when they're the nicest people. Sorry you had a bad experience!
ReplyDeleteThis is amazing. Cops are frazzling. They just make you feel immediately guilty...even when you drive by one and you're doing nothing wrong!
ReplyDeleteOne time I got pulled over but the police officer didn't give me a ticket because my dad was his teacher when he was in high school :0
I got pulled over the other day for going 35 in a 20 (school zone) <-- NO way in hell that's factual, but I didn't have my DL on me so he wasn't about to let me go with a warning. Damn it! But I feel your pain. I'm a horrible driver. Oops.
ReplyDelete› xo fal • falfindshappiness.blogspot.com
Get your $hit together Bonnie :)
ReplyDeletewww.brasshoney.blogspot.com
Okay, this made me laugh a lot. Mostly because it's the other way around in my marriage. I am always getting on my husband about wearing his seatbelt...he still forgets!
ReplyDeleteHaha I am the same way, I have to downplay everything to Mark. I mayyyy have uttered "umm soooo I sort of hit someone on the freeway today" nonchalantly once before...
ReplyDeleteoh this makes me smile! :) You crack me up!
ReplyDeleteOhhhh man... I'm a seatbelt FREAK! You sound juuuuust like my boyfriend. :)
ReplyDeleteMy husband used to tease me about tickets. I got 3 in about a year's worth of marriage. ...until he got 2 tickets in a 6 month period. Then the teasing stopped for some reason :) Now we are both such cautious drivers, we've paid way too much money to local government for silly traffic violations...
ReplyDeleteI used to be so-so on wearing seatbelts...until I moved to Europe. If you're not wearing a seatbelt they will give you a $130 ticket without even blinking!
ReplyDeletehaha. Your lucky Greg is so nice. You need to get a military id. Every time Ben gets pulled over and shows them his military id they salute him and let him go! JK about the saluting part, but they do let him go.
ReplyDeleteOf course I meant "you're" not your. Paranoid around the grammar nazi.
ReplyDeletelol I love the "only like probably around" wording! I do this too! Thing is, he always catches me or finds out how much it really is. I always say I'm rounding down ;)
ReplyDeleteBelieve it. Seat belts are not our thing here in Bhutan. I never wear seat belt while driving, neither does any one of us here. :P
ReplyDeleteI immediately start cyring when I get pulled over too, I hate it! My parent's were big seatbelt enforcers, so thankfully I'm in the habit of wearing mine. If it's off, I feel naked, like when you forget to wear your ring, your hand feels funny.
ReplyDeleteI am proud to say I've only been pulled over twice and got out of a ticket both times. But as far as the seat belt thing goes, I am super anal about putting it on. I have a bit of a death complex, especially in cars, and so it puts my mind at ease to know I'm buckled in.
ReplyDeleteBahahahaha, this conversation is GREAT!
ReplyDeleteI admire your reasoning skills, really I do!
ReplyDeleteI love it! I do the same thing when I have to tell Dennis about something bad. Just act casual and make it sound like it's no big deal lol also.. i'm not above flirting to get out of a ticket. It only really works if the cop is younger though..
ReplyDeleteHaha!
ReplyDeleteTrevor recently got pulled over for not having his license plate "lit" up... who knew that was a law? Anyways, we couldn't find his insurance anywhere, so guess what he did? Trevor pulled it up on his phone and showed the cop! haha He totally accepted it as proof of insurance! So if you know how to access it online, you can do that next time ;)
ReplyDeleteWhere I live, you don't have to keep proof of insurance anymore, they just run your plates. I know this because I also am a terrible driver and have gotten pulled over often and have received many tickets for many different things.
ReplyDeleteGetting pulled over is the worst! I just got pulled on Monday for going 70 in a 50. :( it's the freaking interstate, who goes 50?! Plus I thought it was still 65. Damn $81!
ReplyDeleteHow could you call Greg the "n" word in your blog post? My ancestors were German and I'm offended.
ReplyDeleteHow could you call Greg the "n" word in your blog post? My ancestors were German and I'm offended.
ReplyDeleteI love this post. I love posts that show real life conversations. this one is so great.
ReplyDelete