Welcome to my classroom!
This is me yesterday: First day of school, you fools!
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Here's the skinny on the first two days. Yesterday was wild. First period was my prep and then I had three senior classes in a row and they were bounce bouncing off the walls. The classes got progressively worse as the day went on and by the time I was at my last class they weren't shutting up for nobody. I don't like to pull out mean teacher Bonnie on the first day so I tried to just be cool with it all, but I wasn't cool, folks. One kid I already had to move and make him sit by me because he just wouldn't quit it.
And then there were the cell phones. Oh, the cell phones! Every year it is worse. Those kids are attached to them like nothing I've ever seen. They will literally stare at their phone for the entire 85 minutes of my class if I let them. I had to shut that down quick, but I know next time I see those kids I know they'll have their phones out again, tweeting texting candy crushing away. The madness!
Today was better. To start with, I had a first period class and the best thing about having a class first thing in the morning is they are oh so quiet. Everyone's still tired at 7:50 am, you know? None of that 1:30 pm crazy crap I get later in the day. Which reinforces my theory that all high school classes should be taught before lunch. But anyway, my first period class was a terrific group of juniors. Oh juniors! Nothing has a hold of my heart quite like juniors. They are the perfect age and I love teaching American lit and they are independent and smart without being cocky and too cool to care anymore. Give me a room full of juniors and I'll teach them for daaaaaaaaaays.
Next was a prep and then after lunch I had my AP class which I have been sweating bullets about. Bullets, I tell you! Eight 17 year olds have got me scared out of my mind. They were sweet as can be and smart and seemed so eager to please and maybe my calling in life is to teach AP? One more class of rowdy seniors ended my day, but not nearly as rowdy as my groups from yesterday so after two days and having seen all of my students I hereby declare I have met the beast and the beast shall be tamed!
Even with the stress and the chaos and the 100 degree days, it wasn't hard for the old classroom feel to come right back to me and for me to remember exactly exactly why I love teaching so much. I had students introduce themselves and I got some real gems. The stuff you throw your head back and just laugh to until you have good and laughed.
From the skinniest, lankiest boy in the class: "My name is Ben and you can remember my name because I am so bootylicious."
From a very monotone boy: "My name is Allan and people think I'm a jerk."
From a boy wearing a sloth T shirt: "I'm Jared and I am absolutely passionate about sloths. I love them and everything about them."
From the class clown, perhaps: "I'm Sam and I'm an alcoholic." That one got a roar of laughter from his classmates. Doesn't get much to get those seventeen year olds going.
I stamp my approval on my classes and heartily declare it shall be another awesome school year!