The Life of Bon: Watch Out! Eight types of spam that lurk in your inbox!

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

Watch Out! Eight types of spam that lurk in your inbox!

Because I am anxiously waiting to hear from jobs I have recently applied for, I have been paying more attention to my spam box.  I usually never even venture into that ugly territory, but lately I have thought, "I must!  I must see if there is some important info that has gotten lost in the sea of useless spam!"

There isn't.

But I've discovered a couple of other important things along the way and I am here to share that information with you today.  I know you dread the task of looking through your own spam box.  That'w why we're going to look through mine instead.  I promise you, it's so much more fun!


EIGHT TYPES OF SPAM THAT LURK IN YOUR INBOX
Waiting to steal your money, your husband, and your identity! Oh my!

By The Life of Bon
(And yes, I am getting quite carried away with my titles lately.)


1.  The bossy man demanding that you owe him your love and trust.  They're usually asking for money, but not always.  Sometimes they just want you to respond.  I don't know why.  This dude below demands that I "do not betray his confidence."  Dude.  You're a scammer.  Back up off of me.





2.  The lady that doesn't speak English and wants to be your bestie.  I have enough friends, k thanks.  The question is though, what does this lady really want?  There's got to be some kind of ulterior motive, right?  Or is this really just some lonely soul out there in the universe begging me to befriend her?





3.  The "get more twitter followers."  This doesn't really deserve its own category, I just wanted to talk about this.   Twenty bones for 1000 twitter followers?  Sheesh!  People are cheap now days!  Also I have seen quite a few people who do this.  It ain't too hard to figure out when the nerdy kid who nobody likes has 2000+ followers.  They're a bunch of bots following you and well know it!  I think it's weird.  If you do it, then, well, to each his own, but let it be known- I THINK IT'S WEIRD.
4.


4.  The people trying to convince me to cheat on Hubs with another cheating wife.  Tempting, I mean wow, it's terribly tempting, it's just...




5.  The spam mail that clearly does not understand its audience.  How did you know that I am dying to meet single black people just like myself?  Internet spammes, you be geniuses!

6.  The spam that makes you terrified of everything and everyone. Am I dating a sexual predator?  You're right!  I totally am!






7.  Spam that uses every dirty trick in the book including but not limited to: somebody dying, faith in God, love for humanity, you are the last hope to save this person.  And money.  Of course, money. 


8.  Spam that blatantly asks you to send all your personal information over the internet to a site you don't know and a person you have never met.  Why yes!  That sounds like a terrific idea!


The question is, who falls for this stuff?  These spammers must have some success or they wouldn't keep doing the same tricks, right? Someone out there is sending their credit card info to a stranger over the internet, meeting black singles and cheating on their wife.  Simultaneously.  WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?  As soon as we stop these people we will stop the spammers themselves.  No success and these guys will be forced to find another way to find a living.  It is our mission to find people who fall for spammers and alert them that they are all fake.  Not real! Not a one of them! Wise up, people!  Share if you want, twitter, facebook, you know the ways.  The more people who are aware of spam the less spam we will receive!

And because I am always so curious.  Have you ever fallen for one of these tricks?  Come on.... tell the truth....

29 comments:

  1. I get a lot of "Hey handsome man" spam. I find this interesting considering I'm a woman.

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  2. my favorite is still the "enlarge your penis." I don't know who told them I was so self-conscious about mine...

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  3. Blah I usually just glance through my spam quick and then delete it all. And sadly I think it is probably the older people that fall for these things.

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  4. Holy cow you get so much spam! The worst of my spam is emails from places I though something once and probably never will again but I'm too lazy to simply unsubscribe from their listservs.

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  5. My husband used to work for Geek Squad (selling their service, not fixing computers, sadly) and I felt so bad for older people that fell for these types of things and ended up sending money to the "FBI" and still had to pay to get their computer fixed :(

    I just checked my spam. I have emails from both Jessica Alba and Angelina Jolie! Wow, I feel bad that I've been making them wait so long for a response that they've had to email me multiple times!

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  6. Old people. I know that sounds awful, but that's who falls for this stuff. I feel like you need to pass an IQ test before you're allowed to use a computer because these people really do fall from this stuff!

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  7. I read somewhere recently that these things are purposefully made hard to believe in order to root out skeptical people right away and only target the most vulnerable and naive. They'll do a mass mailing of thousands, but they only are hoping for one or two replies, someone capable of being taken for everything because they never stop to question it.

    I used to work in a bank and once came across someone who had been taken in by a "Nigerian Oil" scam. They'd sent someone $200 by Western Union, had overdrawn their account to do it, and kept calling asking if they had received a large deposit. I was able to figure out what had happened when I started to ask where they thought this deposit was coming from, etc, but even after I explained that this scam was fairly common, they were unwilling to believe me. They were actually probably lucky that they'd only been taken for $200.

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  8. Spam makes me angry....i get more spam then i do regular email....

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  9. Hahaha I can't quit laughing at this. The best part is I saw one you didn't talk about in one of the pictures! The Senior People Meet Dating! Ahahaha Bonnie you old lady!!

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  10. HAHAH I laughed my head off reading this! Thanks Bonnie!

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  11. I can't even begin to count all the Asian Dating, Black Dating, Jewish Date, Senior Dating messages that pile up in my spam box. As much as I love all the aforementioned, none is really "my type." Oh, yeah, and I'm married. Happily.

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  12. Some of these are plain ridiculous!

    morrellfairytale.blogspot.com

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  13. Hahahahaha, this made my night! These are hilarious! I think sadly, a lot of older people fall for things like these. I mean, they trust everyone to be good, upstanding, honest people. They forget, or are in denial, that the world is evil now... :P

    Amberly
    http://amberlyandjoe.blogspot.com

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  14. Okay, for your love of pranking: my sister pranked her husband by paying for 2,000 twitter followers on his account...he had no idea and was so excited to log on to twitter and find thousands of new followers. He bragged to his family...and it was all a prank in the name of Twitter :)

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  15. Some people do! I can't believe it though...

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  16. You know what makes me the most mad about these? Are the people who use God as part of their scams. I have seen this before and it makes me so angry!! Enough people think God is a joke that the last thing Christians need is someone actually using Him in a scam.

    All irritation aside...this was pretty funny! :)

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  17. I had to share this - I discovered this site a few years ago and check back every now and again - it's hilarious to read. These guys "play along" with scammers and see how much random stuff they can get them to do - one of them got a scammer to send him a whole bunch of random crap. It's kind of playing them at their own game. Hilarious! http://www.419eater.com/html/letters.htm

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  18. I had a boss (mid 30s) who totally fell for the "you have a rich uncle you never knew about, he's dead now and left you his millions." She went around the office bragging about how much money she was going to get and how she was going to quit.

    It was the best week ever.

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  19. I never even read through my spam anymore. While I'm deleting I do notice some of the subjects and they're pretty ridiculous.

    I love your drawings by the way! The dots under the question marks and exclamations after HUBS look like a smiley face to me :)

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  20. I always wonder who falls for this crap, too; but then last year, at my pretty schmancy liberal arts college they had to send out an e-mail saying DON'T FALL FOR THIS because some freshman girl had given like $200 to someone... but I can't remember what the scam was now. If people didn't fall for it, I feel like they'd quit.

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  21. It really is crazy what people come up with and sad when people fall for it! I get a lot of the "a relative of yours abroad had died and you are entitled to an inheritance" emails too.

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  22. The amount of spam I am getting recently is out of control. I never used to get any. You forgot to mention the lure of free food if you take a survey. I get so many of those ones every day!

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  23. My email once got hacked and emailed EVERYONE in my address book ads for Viagra...including all of my professors in the English Department. Who are mostly men. Much older men.

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  24. This post had me laughing so hard! Especially number 2! This must be the perfect type of humor for me, Bon, I cannot stop chuckling at work right now.

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  25. I am not a fan of spam to spicy for my liking.........oh hang on that is the cold meat which has nothing to do with the computer and internet...............lol

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  26. This post was really funny.

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  27. this is so good. maybe you don't get them, but my spam is FULL of man part enlargers. is that really relevant to me? come on email!!!

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  28. I did once but it wasn't an email. It was a Craigslist add. I was looking for a job and then when the guy contacted me it all sounded legit. He said he had an office and what my pay would be and how many hours a week I would work and all of my duties. Then, he informs me I'm hired and he will be sending me a check to deposit in my bank account and then wire him all but 10% of it. RED FLAG!!! I told him no, I wasn't interested, DO NOT SEND ME THAT CHECK, stop contacting me or I will go to the police. Even after all of that he still sent me a check for $2000.00. I just took everything I had to the local police. I don't think they could do anything but this guy had my address!!! Luckily nothing ever happened after that but even so it's creepy. People like that somehow get your bank info and drain your account and leave you to take the fall for depositing an illegal check. All bad but luckily I'm still here. :p

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