The Life of Bon: Let's celebrate, people!

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Let's celebrate, people!



Dress:  Nordstrom

A few months ago a facebook friend of mine posted that her husband got all As for the semester.  I can't exactly tell you why, but the status bothered me.

And so, I wrote a facebook status rebuttal, if you will.  It said something along the lines of  "The only thing more annoying than bragging about your good grades on facebook is bragging about your husband's good grades on facebook."

Thankfully, my brother called me out on it.  Gosh, I'm lucky to have brothers.  (I realize that sounds sarcastic, but I say it in earnest.)

He wrote me a very kind private message on facebook and basically said he thinks it's great that we celebrate accomplishments- whether they be ours or our spouses'.  I celebrate when Greg gets the lead in a play, my brother's wife celebrates when he runs a marathon, etc.  He said that he likes the positivity of these posts, and being there's so much negativity, suffering, hardship, etc in the world, there's nothing wrong with celebrating achievements or successes.  In other words, let people brag.  He also said that my status didn't make me seem like a very nice person.  I thought about it for a few minutes and decided I agreed with him.  So I took it down.

I was reminded of all this today when I read Kym's post about celebrating achievements.  Facebook and social media have done something weird to us, I believe.  We are paranoid about what we can share. This is too personal, this is too braggy, this is too complainy, this is too boring, this is oversharing, this is too vague.  (Articles like this one criticize practically ever possibly thing you could ever want to share on social media.)  I admit that, like when reading the status of her husband's grades a few months ago, I have been annoyed especially by the braggy facebook statuses.  "Hey! You or someone close to you did something awesome/ reached a new goal/ had great success?  Good now shut up!"

I'm not proud of this attitude of mine, I just realize that it was kind of there... a slight annoyance of anyone sharing a celebration of facebook or any social media outlet.  If I really want to go all psychologist on myself I would probably tell you that it stems from my own insecurities and doubts and struggles and fears.  Isn't that what it always stems from?  I don't care who you are, there is struggle and fear in all of us so perhaps more than anything we can all relate to being annoyed by a brag.  Somehow we think it brings us down when others achieve.

It doesn't.

I'll never forget the night about a year ago when I went to an improv workshop with Greg taught by Dave Rozowsky.  Strangely enough, he taught a lot of life lessons. One of the ones that stuck out the most to me was that he said that we have to give up on the idea that success or happiness is going to run out. It isn't. Just because one person buys a house doesn't mean all the houses are gone and now I can't buy a house.  One person's pregnancy doesn't mean we're out of pregnancies for the year.  One person's healthy body doesn't mean there aren't any more healthy bodies for me. There is enough.  There will always be enough.

There. Is. Enough.

Admittedly, I have been a bit worried since I got pregnant that people may be annoyed by my pregnancy posts or updates.  Maybe I'm overdoing it?  But gosh dang it, I'm excited!  So should I not show that excitement because others think it's annoying?  A blogger friend of mine just suffered a miscarriage.  Should I not post about feeling my baby move inside of me?  My cousin just got pregnant with her third boy, should I not say I'm stoked about having a girl?  The online world is so hard to navigate, and especially, it seems when you are happy.

I guess I think we all need to stop it with that crap.  Let's let people brag!  Life is hard enough even with all of our great accomplishments.  So why hide them?  Successes and celebrations are what make life worth living.

And so, I declare this an official brag safe zone.  Let's let the best bragging session of our lives begin.  I will start and brag to my heart's content about me and the people in my life.  Then it's your turn, brag to me in the comments about why your life is awesome.  I can't wait to hear them and I hope to be reading braggy comments all weekend long.

Here goes!

I ran a mile today!  I have stayed healthy and energized and am gaining a healthy amount of weight in my pregnancy!  In other words, I'm not too fat yet!

I'm going to Europe in two months!

My husband surprised me with KFC tonight which is my favorite.  He's a good husband who makes an efforts to do little things like this for me all the time.

My mom is an incredible woman- she lost my dad unexpectedly four years ago but hasn't let that get her down at all.  She lives a life of service and never acts disadvantaged or victimized.  She is giving and a great listener.  She is the strongest person I know.

My husband is very good looking.  He has a fast metabolism and a strong jawline.  He has a full head of hair.  He is better looking than any of the boys I used to date or have crushes on.

Two of my brothers are really fast runners.  They both qualified for the Boston marathon.  Wow!

My third brother is winning a fitness competition at his work because his body fat percentage is so low.

My fourth brother (four brothers!) is an awesome lawyer who does his best to get me out of all my speeding tickets.  He is a very quiet, likeable guy who everyone loves.

My little sister is a genius.  She got a 34 on the ACT and is graduating from college in biochemisty or something equally ridiculous in April.

My oldest sister is a terrific writer.  She inspires me to keep writing.  She also makes the best salads I've ever had.

My other sister (three sisters!) lives in Germany.  This week she gets to go to Israel.  She has lived all over the United States and Europe and gets to travel and see so many cool places that I will only dream of.

My high school friend has launched one of the most successful projects on kickstarter ever.  He's going to be a millionaire.  Go dinos!

My best friend was able to quit teaching and now makes the same amount if not more from her etsy jewelry business.

My student teacher is doing so great in the classroom.  She gets better and more confident every day.  The students really like her. She has an interview on Monday and I know she will easily land a teaching job.

I'm going to Arizona in two weeks to visit all my college homies!  I have awesome girlfriends who I have been able to maintain close relationships with.  I'm so grateful for my friends!

Wow!  It feels so good to brag celebrate the good things in life.  Now it's your turn!  Please leave a comment bragging about celebrating something fantastic in your life.  Remember... There is enough!

48 comments:

  1. I have awesome red hair I wouldn't change for the world!

    I got accepted into graduate school for Speech Language Pathology!

    I have an interview for THE PERFECT graduate assistantship on Wednesday.

    I graduate from college in 56 days!

    I have a blog that is starting to gain a more regular following and I LOVE writing each night.

    I successfully went 6 months without buying clothes and am proud of it!

    - Great post Bonnie. :) Sometimes I hate talking about myself, but this made me realize how many things I am blessed with!

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  2. I invested in the guidelight after you mentioned it. Can't wait to see it in person!

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  3. Wow! these are great. I just want to say that you are so right about "posting anxiety" when it comes to facebook. I question everything I share, and I feel like it's getting unhealthy. I hardly ever post on FB, but anytime I want to share something that is mildly self-focused, I have a little battle in my mind about whether or not to share it. I consider blocking the post from certain people, and there have been many times when I've posted something and then deleted it moments later out of fear that others might think I'm bragging.

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  4. What a nice post! It's so important for us all to be happy for each other! Congratulations on your baby girl :)

    Natalie,
    http://natalie-patalie.blogspot.com/

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  5. This is a great post - I've recently realized that whenever I come across posts of people celebrating things I do a mental eye roll and I really need to stop. I definitely think that we should all celebrate more and be excited for others! So, here is my list:
    - John and I spend at least an hour every night catching up and cuddling, I know I need my adult only time.
    - My son is doing absolutely amazing in preschool and is a crazy fast learner!
    - We are going to the rodeo this weekend!
    - My horse is doing awesome and training is coming along great.
    - I got to play with the cutest miniature donkey that was only two days old today.
    - I am going to be going back to college next semester.
    Thanks for this :)

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  6. thank you for this wonderful post! I love that you said "there is enough"- this is something so true that is a hard concept to grasp. You make me feel better about bragging about my grades in school, my upcoming wedding, my start at blogging. PS I would adore to be your student teacher. I am sure she loves you!

    xx L
    www.laurynlasko.blogspot.com

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  8. Thanks for bragging about everyone. My younger sister is a genius. My older sister is a terrific writer. My other sister lives in Germany. Awesome. Reed is da man for calling you out. Love your dress! Love you Bop! And the comment removed by me was the same as this one. I just changed one word. Love you!

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  9. My marriage is amazing, I am worshipped by a man who looks at me with love in his eyes every day. He tells me he loves me at least 100 times per day and we txt each other kisses all day long! My daughter, who I had at 16, is the kindest and sweetest woman now and makes me proud every day. I ran my firstt 5k on Saturday and ten weeks ago I couldn't run the length of myself. I have lost over 4 stone in weight over the past year and I AM PROUD of all these things. (I brag regularly on my blog! I think on ur own blog or ur own facebook u should be allowed to brag)

    http://onegoodth1ngaday.blogspot.co.uk/

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  10. This is such a great post. I never minded the bragging on Facebook. I agree with your brother. I love to hear good news. What I hate is the vague posts. "I'm so angry". Always seemed like a desperate need for someone to notice the person posting and to PLEASE ask them publicly why they are mad. or something similar. I'm not on Facebook anymore. After a 'friend' posted a selfie of herself getting chemotherapy, I thought, "There is just something unhealthy in all of this.". I've never regretted it. I see blogs as much much different. BTW - My daughter got a 34 too. Did you catch that brag? :) Just wait until your daughter is born. Brags x a million!

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  11. My boyfriend is doing amazingly well in his new job! My best friend moved to the other side of the world all by herself and is loving it! One of my sisters has just been promoted in a job she adores! My other sister has just landed her dream nanny job in Australia! My parents have had the worst luck in the last few years (my dad has been made redundant three times, and my mum is about to undergo her fourth major operation in as many years) but they both remain so kind and generous! And I am getting ready to visit the US for the first time and see my sister for the first time in a year and a half! Good times all round!

    Ps - LOVE the celebration shots at the beginning of the post!

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  12. I am so guilty of judging people's "braggy" status updates. I love this idea that there is enough- it is such a good way to look at it!
    My kindergarten class loves me and I've taught them how to add numbers to 20 *mostly by accident.* I am getting married in a month and so excited, I am so proud of my blog, I have wonderful parents who have made great choices through a really hard time.
    Happy Friday!

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  13. I'm so glad you wrote this post. Your sister sounds a lot like my boyfriend. He made a 34 on his ACT as well and is going to college to major in Biomedical Engineering with a minor in Biochemistry. Jealousy is something I struggle with everyday, especially when it comes to my boyfriend. I know I sound awful because you're supposed to be proud of and support your significant other all the time, right? Well, I suck at that. I am proud of him but I make it hard for him to enjoy his success because I'm always so down on myself. I feel like he's so great at pretty much everything and I suck at everything. He's the genius boy that makes 4's and 5's on all his AP exams without even trying (I passed one and at that was AP Lang, my best and favorite subject, with a 3. He made a 4. This caused jealousy times a million because English was supposed to be my thing and I felt like he outdid my on that too). I know I sound ridiculously stupid and annoying. I don't know how he puts up with me. I'm trying to get better at it, I really am. It's just really hard. So this status hit the nail right on the head for me.

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  14. Love this post.

    My son is kicking more and more and is a healthy weight and size even though I don't look 24 weeks along.

    One of my students who has an IEP and an F in a couple classes was able to bring his grade up to a D for the end of the term.

    I was able to play in the 9th grade vs staff volleyball game and all my students thought I was awesome (I did play in high school).

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  15. I cannot tell you how much I love this post..THANK YOU. Let's celebrate life!

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  16. I love this post!

    I always question what I put on facebook but I think its important to celebrate!

    -I'm due with my second son in 2 weeks but I'm going to miss my basketball belly. I like when people stare at me because of it (and because I'm also carrying around a 10 month old).

    - My 10 month old son has a full head of curly curly brown hair! I just love it!

    - My husband has been going to school for 10 years to get the job he has always wanted and fingers crossed that its just around the corner!! Long hours, a bachelors, masters, doctorate, a wife, and (almost) 2 kids later he has reached exactly what he has been wanting. I could not be more proud of him! and proud of our little family :)

    Congrats on your little girl!!!! That's so exciting!

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  17. Love this post! I wish I had read it last year when trying to conceive. I would get so angry and sad when someone else beat me again to getting pregnant. I never let it last long because I felt bad for feeling that way but the women that would really trip my trigger were the ones who complained about being pregnant over and over when I was dying for morning sickness and all the other stuff that goes along with it. Now I'm 22 weeks today and I love being pregnant!

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  18. In regards to social media, i can get annoyed, no so much by celebratory updates but by people that have to post on a daily basis how much they are inlove with their significant other...*rolls eyes*..like if you have to say it so much, is it really true? lol. Otherwise i tend to be really happy for other's accomplishments! I love to hear about you having a little girl! I have two boys and just about everyone in my life that is pregnant or has had a baby in the last year/ year and a half have ALL had girls. To be honest I love having boys and yes having a "baby doll" to dress up and take to ballet would be so much fun but that doesnt mean i can;t be happy for all my friends or for you! Motherhood is a magical time, sometimes it wont seem that way but it is. I'm happy that anymore gets to experience it, who wants to! As NeNe would say "Twirl girl! Twirl!"

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  19. I completely agree with this. It shouldn't matter what other people think, celebrate, brag, be happy and post all you want :)

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  20. I copied part of your post as a facebook status because I loved it!

    -I have the most handsome little dog that you ever did see and he really is a good boy!
    -I'm on a committee at work that is kind of a big deal. At the end of it I will get a certification that will make me a resource person for an ENTIRE HOSPITAL. Just little old me and 1 hospital.
    -I get to blog and I love it.
    -My husband invited me for a lunch date today. I feel super special.

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  21. I don't get super annoyed about other people's 'bragging' about awesome life things, but I do get insecure when talking about my own excitement! For some reason I'm always afraid people will find it annoying - and I have no idea why that is! But it definitely steals the joy from some fun events :-) It sounds like you have a lot to be happy about, so you deserve to be excited and share it with the world!

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  22. I've lost 45 pounds in five months! Yes!!!

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  23. Love this post! I was horrified this morning to read about the mean-as-hell website with the purpose of essentially bullying bloggers, GOMI. This post is the perfect antidote! Your brother sounds so lovely and wise. I love how he approached you about this and how you were open to what he was saying. Beautiful. I think that in itself is something to celebrate!

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  24. Just now my friend and I were talking about how jealous we are of a girl we graduated with who is in LA with some great opportunities. My friend said "good for her", and I was even a little jealous that she was able to say that! Now I'm hating myself for being this way, but this post has me motivated to be more positive and excited for the achievement of others!

    Something I can brag about- I have a really great natural eye for design, art, and what looks good and what doesn't. So far it has gotten me lots of design opportunities without even going to school for design!

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  25. this is seriously such a great post. I linked back to it on my blog--I love the message! shouldn't we be allowed to "brag" about our accomplishments!? let's all be happy for each other! I'm going to work on that this week! you're the best, bonnie!

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  26. I think it's important to understand why we sometimes brag on social media - because it keeps us accountable for our achievements! Sometimes I tweet about an early morning workout and stuff like that because it keeps me accountable for what I set out to do! So, no sense getting annoyed, you never know why someone might be bragging!

    I don't know what I can brag about myself though! I was excited because I woke up early for Body Pump today even though I didn't sleep well last night and I totally just wanted to roll over and go back to sleep!

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  27. I definitely have this problem and I hate that I do. With my husband still in law school it is hard for me to read the post where people our age are so excited about building houses and going on great vacations or buying new SUVs. But I know that I will be be so excited when it is our turn. I need to chill out. Anyways, I have two handsome boys and another one on the way. Yay! Boys are awesome and we are incredibly blessed!

    PS You can totally celebrate that you are having a girl! I just may be a little bit jealous but that doesn't stop me from being so happy and excited for you!

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  28. I really, really needed this today. Thank you! (Also: I have an awesome boyfriend who will do lots of things to make me feel better, including singing in a ridiculous voice and tickle contests; I have a gaggle of really wonderful friends, and my family is a bunch of goofs who constantly entertain me. There, I bragged!)

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  29. I think this is an awesome post! And I'm right here celebrating with you!

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  30. I love this so much I will probably so my own post on it. Brag on

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  31. I love this so much I will probably so my own post on it. Brag on

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  32. Woohoo!!
    I have the most wonderful, talented husband I could ever want.
    My 3 children are healthy, smart, and good looking.
    I am trusting God to make a way for us to go to Paris sometime this year.
    My parents live behind us and we help take care of them.
    My husband is working on his Bachelor's Degree and I am so proud of him.
    I have some of the most amazing friends whom I met by being an Army wife.

    Wow! That feels great. Bragging and celebrating.
    I think I might do some more of that. :)

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  33. I love this! I always try to celebrate everything - the big and the mundane. My husband is doing fantastic in law school, I'm doing a good job adopting a healthier diet and staying away from junk, we've saved a large amount of money this year by cutting down our budget immensly, I write every day and love it. I'm happy.

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  34. I am getting married in 22 days and my fiance is the sweetest most perfect guy ever! I'm so lucky to have found him! Yes I know, gag. But I'm celebrating!

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  35. My fiance just accepted a new job offer! He has worked really hard and has been really crossing his fingers for this and he just got it!

    I hope to celebrate everything-- big or small-- and celebrate with others too!

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  36. Bonnie what a GREAT post. I love that you address this issue, and you're right. There is so much negativity and sadness in the world and while we should be sensitive to people around us, we should also celebrate the little victories and the things that make us happy! I think that's what Heavenly Father expects us to do when He blesses us with those things right?? I loved reading your list too :) Mostly I'm just stoked to be pregnant and healthy and preparing to welcome my little dude into the world in May... even though childbirth scares the friggin crap outta me when I think about it too long ha!

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  37. This is probably one of my favorite posts you've ever written. :)

    I'm finally feeding my body all of the right stuff and working out 6 times a week! I feel healthy!

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  38. I freaking love this post.

    okay time to brag... my husband is smoking hot, I like my green eyes, and I ran 5 miles the other day.

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  39. I have a draft waiting to post written about these same things! People have the right to shine without worrying that others are going to feel insecure or jealous or sad. Post about your happiness! Its infectious! And yes, please more pregnancy posts. It fuels my baby hunger ;)

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  40. Yes! I love this! I feel like I have SO MUCH to celebrate in my life right now but I hesitate to talk about it because I don't want to make others feel bad. Thanks for providing an encouraging space for that!! So here we go!

    - I'm going to Paris in two weeks!!! With a few days in London thrown in there for good measure. I used to live in Paris so this feels so much to me like going home. :)

    - I just planned a trip to Thailand with my husband and dad/stepmom for this summer - we're going to ride elephants!!!! Dream come true!!

    - My husband has a job working with a pro basketball team in China - crazy kind of awesome. :) We were so worried last summer he wouldn't find a job at all.

    - I get to be a full time writer!!! I love love love it! It's so fun to dedicate the majority of my day to something I love and something that's meaningful to me.

    - I bought strawberries and blueberries yesterday which means I can have a rocking smoothie for breakfast! Breakfast is basically my arch nemesis so this is a pretty big deal.

    - I have a kindle that allows me to purchase a book and have it immediately instead of waiting months and months for it to be shipped to China and make its way through customs.

    So much goodness!! I need to make more of a point of noticing all the good around me and in my life. Thanks!

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  41. Ha this is amazing! I do this every day of my life to Cody!

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  42. This post is so great!!

    I have recently started a new job that I am really excited about, started doing freelance web design, and just launched my first blog! Feelin' pretty good :)

    Thanks for this!!

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  43. This post is perfection and everyone needs to read it!

    -I change the world every day in my job. I run a college access program in an urban school district and I demand world changers.

    -I move mountains through my work in college access and admissions.

    -I am married to the kindest man on the planet who started the non profit that allows me to change the world.

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  44. I LOVE this!

    I also love that:
    - It's March and it's still boiling hot beach weather everyday in Sydney!
    - I have amazing friends who are super successful and also just generally awesome people to hang out with
    - I am blessed with a job that is super flexible and pays really well

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  45. What a GREAT reminder! There is enough - sometimes more than enough. Thanks Bon! :)

    Oh and congratulations on baby girl!! She's going to be beautiful and so loved!

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  46. loved this post and congrats on your pregnancy!

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  47. What a great post! I totally understand how you feel about the achievements running out. I feel that way often but remind myself that there is plenty to go around, and celebrating others achievements will only increase the likelihood of good things coming to me!

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