The Life of Bon: Real

Sunday, July 01, 2012

Real

My mamas (both my mom and Hubs' mom chipped in- ain't I lucky?) gave me a sweet new camera for my birthday.  It's none of those thousand dollar DSLRs or whatever they're called, but still, this bad boy can point and shoot with the best of them.
Point.
Shoot.
Point.
Shoot.
Good job, new camera.

The classic ugly face in car shot.  Also, my hair is now peach.

The classic "Bonnie, if you don't get that camera out of my face while I'm driving, I'm going to crash this car" shot.

The classic, "Oh, this is actually going to go somewhere where a lot of people will see it?  Okay, fine, I'll smile," shot.

The classic road construction overlooking the sunset shot.

Not too bad for a point and shoot, eh?

I had an interesting Sunday today.  You know those days where you stop in your tracks and look at your life and suddenly you're very scared and feel completely inadequate and one hundred percent insecure?  I guess it was one of those.  Sometimes I feel like I take little steps forward in my life only to take a giant leap backward.

It was a reflective day, full of heightened emotions and contemplative minutes.  After an afternoon inside, I needed out of our 525 square apartment.  I needed to clear my head.  To reset.  I took 1984 by George Orwell with me, because really, nothing resets me like a good distopian novel, you know how it goes.

I went to a park that I thought would be completely secluded.  Where I could read and reflect and ponder.  The park was jammed full of people.  And I mean jammed.  I sat in my car for a minute deciding if I was going to join in on the mayhem, or if I should seek a different park.  And then I spied, sitting under a tree, my sister.  Her kids were nearby- riding on bikes, crawling over rocks, and splashing in the little brooke.

So I got out of the car, and went over to say hello to my sister.  We both have got a bit of an attention problem, so the conversation jumped quickly from a cruise to the best doctors in the city to her daughter's broken arm until we finally landed on blogging.  My sister dabbled in blogging a little bit, but decided to stop. 
"It's just... I feel like it's not real.  Like you only hear the good things about people's lives.  And you see these beautiful outfits, and their perfect kids... and you leave the blog not feeling uplifted at all. 
You leave feeling like you're not adequate."

I had to agree with my sister.  Of all the the things I struggle with most in blogging, this one tops the list.  The ability to tell the truth.  To be completely honest and real.  And to not feel inadequate when I read blogs of people who are neither honest nor real.  Blogging is a funny thing.  Just the mere fact that you are writing about your life on such a public venue schews the truthfulness of it all  Is anybody 100% honest about their lives?  How come no one writes about their marital spats?  Or their insecurities and doubts?  Or their jealousies?  I understand that blogging is supposed to be uplifting, but is only writing about the "perfection" in our life really uplifting others?

I left my encounter with my sister feeling everything I want to feel when I leave a blog- like I had been uplifted, like I had just caught up with an old friend, like everything was going to be okay.
The day overall left me with a lot of goals and hopes for the future.  Things I want to do better in the future.  I want to:

-Be more real.
-Be less selfish
-Be more grateful
-Bite my tongue and think before I say something
-Be more patient
-Be friendlier
-Be closer to family
-Have more faith
-Doubt less
-Trust more
-Stress less
-Laugh more
-Serve more
-Feel the spirit more
-Be more sincere in my prayers
-Reflect more

I suppose I'll start here on this blog with my goal to be more grateful.  Thank you for reading this blog of mine.  Thanks for making me feel important and thank you for leaving sweet comments. I guess it means alot to old Bon Bon.
(Don't forget to enter the Shabby Apple giveaway here!)

18 comments:

  1. I love this post and all of your others :) I always leave your blog with great insights or laughter. Your blog always lifts up my spirits in one way or another. Thanks for your honesty and gratitude. I hope you had a great birthday! Love ya!

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  2. i like your cute peach hair:)

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  3. I really love this post. I agree wholeheartedly. Something that I have always strived for with my blog is to make sure that those who know me in real life would be able to see that the person I am on my blog is the same person. But sometimes it is hard not to feel like we need to have the best outfits, the best adventures, the best pictures, etc. I love your blog though, and I think it is very honest and real all the time, not just today. Thanks for setting an amazing example for all bloggers to just be real.

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  4. I love reading your posts. Being a blog newbie, it's been overwhelming seeing all the "perfection" going on. I love how honest you are, and grateful that your "keeping it real." That is what I'm striving towards, thank you for inspiring me.

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  5. I completely agree with what you said about blogging! I would get really really down on myself reading blogs and it was so poisonous in my life cause I would compare and then feel inadequate, like I needed my life to be the perfect ones others portray. But then that feeling is actually what drove me to start blogging. I wanted to be real and show people that there is still someone that was going to be honest and try to uplift others by connecting instead of pretending like my life was perfect which it completely was not. I remember my husband's sister telling me that really I should know that all blogs are just showing what they want to show and if I was feeling bad it was basically my fault, not the bloggers fault. Which is true to a point but I still felt like people were ridiculously fake and it was annoying. I don't really know what I'm trying to say.... haha Just that I agree and I hope that anyone who visits my blog doesn't think I'm fake and feels uplifted afterwards :)

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  6. Oh i totally agree with you. Most of the time pinterest and other blogs leave me feeling like i'm very boring, unattractive, unfashionable, too honest and not doing enough.

    I actually think now i've started to only glance over some unless the post that day is going to be a real one you know? I may not post enough, or be as funny or stylish as others but I blog for me and that's ok with me :)

    and your new camera looks great! I just borrowed my sisters today and I can't wait to play with it.

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  7. what a great post- i couldn't agree more. i am struggling too as a newbie to blog world. a lot of the blogs i've come across just scream perfection, and i find myself questioning :"why am i not living like that?" your blog is real and funny and i enjoy reading about it!

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  8. I really love this post. In my opinion, I think the blogs that show their sadness and vunerablility are the ones I can relate to the best. No one is perfect- your blog shouldn't be either. I've unfollowed countless of blogs before just because they've come off as I don't know, fake? I think it's best to sometimes think of your blog as a diary; the good, the bad, the ugly. having readers is a bonus, but it's good to think of your blog as a source to document your life.
    I can honestly say I really enjoy your blog- I'm glad I found it :) oh, and I like the peach hair! hehe :D

    xo, samantha
    sammyblackwood.com

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  9. There is one blog I had to unfollow because the writer was a little to REAL. It started to just be super whiny. I know life is just roses, but I don't like to focus on negative either. I'm trying to find a good way to blog about the fact that I am puking too much to blog. Haven't quite figured it out yet. BUT, have you ever read seriouslysoblessed.blogspot.com? Its a joke, and a perfect example of how blogging can be a way to showcase how perfect your life is. She doesn't post anymore, but you should read some of her early stuff. Blogging comic genius.

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  10. It's so true. I don't want my blog to be perfect but it's hard to be vulnerable at times.

    It's on of the reasons I really like your blog. It definitely shows me who you are.

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  11. with you til the end of this blog post! Loved it! Thanks for finding my blog and following. I am glad to return the favor!

    :)

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  12. You are super cute! I love your blog! Look forward to reading more!! Xoxo

    Cami
    Oliviamoone.blogspot.com

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  13. You are super cute! I love your blog! Look forward to reading more!! Xoxo

    Cami
    Oliviamoone.blogspot.com

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  14. You are super cute! I love your blog! Look forward to reading more!! Xoxo

    Cami
    Oliviamoone.blogspot.com

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  15. Wow. THANK you. That is so true. I had one of the worst mornings I've had in awhile..and my blog post today? Didn't even mention it. Thank you for your insight. AAAND your cute comment to me. I'm a new follower of yours too!

    Amanda at: we & serendipity

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  16. you are so cute!! I love the goals you have, good luck with them!

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  17. Nice picture on this real lives.

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  18. I've been reading you for a while and haven't commented yet. This is so true. The world isn't always happy and neither are all the bloggers in it. I love seeing happy, go-lucky people but you have to stop and think, "no one has a perfect life... I mean even Kim K can't have the perfect marriage.. so how are all these people just always perfect".

    I'm not perfect and I totally want to steal (I mean borrow) your list of goals!

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