The Life of Bon: I think I'll stay

Thursday, May 23, 2013

I think I'll stay



It all started a week ago Monday.

We were in the car on the way to take Greg's mom out for dinner for a post Mother’s day treat.  We had both been feeling the strain and pressure of the past few weeks since finding out that I would need to get EL certified to teach in California.  I had been studying my brains out that afternoon and was feeling so overwhelmed with the ridiculous and specific things I was required to know about California Education Laws.

And so we drove on, frustrated and quiet, each silently mulling over our stresses and anxieties.

Greg interrupted my thoughts.

“What if I told you I didn’t want to do theatre anymore and wanted wanted to become something like a therapist instead?”

“I would support you,”  I replied automatically, not even considering if the question were hypothetical.  Of course it was.   “Would you ever want to do that?” I prodded when Greg was silent.


“I don’t know… Maybe.  One day down the road.  I think it would be cool to help people straighten out their lives.”

“It’d certainly be different…” I remarked nonchalantly.

And that was it.  The end of the conversation.

Greg brought it up at dinner again.  With his parents.  Just that the idea had been floating around in his head.  I lodged it away in a nether alcove of my brain to think about later.

But then again on the way home, Greg brought up the same issue.  “Bonnie.  I’m serious.  I don’t think I can do California.  Just seeing how stressed you are and how difficult everything is… do we really want to blow all of our savings and just move out with neither of us with jobs?"

I shrugged.  It certainly hadn’t sounded preferable, but I was willing.  I am willing to do many stupid things.

“Besides… I don’t think I could do that lifestyle even if I were successful.  And I don't even know that I would be happy in that field.  I don’t want the instability and the late nights.  I want to be able to be home with you and raise a family.  Admit it, Bonnie, the majority of the tension, stress and fighting in our marriage comes from my career choice.”

“That's not true...”  I trailed.

“It is too!  You know it is- stress about money, about savings, about when to move, about priorities, our future family…” 

I didn’t say much more, mostly just listened and tried to sort it all out.  It was so much, so fast.  When you have been planning for two years on a big move, it takes more than a couple of minutes and a few mile markers for you to be right fine and dandy with something completely different.  Greg asked me to understand and begged me to tell him what I was thinking and feeling about everything, but I just couldn't.  My little mind needed to sort it all out first.  Time to process.

When we got home I thought about studying for the CTEL.  But then bagged it.  The motivation, the push, the pressure, it had all evaporated just like that.  I lay down to try to sort out my feelings and woke up three hours later to a splitting head ache.  Three ibuprofens and a swig of diet coke did the trick and I sat staring into the fireplace, hoping everything would somehow sort itself out.

And then, I don’t know why, but I just started to cry.  I felt so completely lost and confused and who even knows what’s the right thing to your life?  What if we were on the brink of making a giant mistake that would somehow totally alter our destiny and happiness and future everything beautiful?  Would I always regret not moving to California with Greg?  Would we never have our big adventure- were we to be just some of the many scared dream chasers, never moving out of state, never striking out on our own?

At the same time, I felt an undeniable sense of relief and peace.  No more California teaching hoops.  No more stressing about $1500 apartment rentals.  No more wondering when we can ever start a family because when will Greg make enough through acting to support us?  It felt as if all of those troubles that were always flying around so wildly in my head had suddenly found a place to rest.

To tell you the truth, I suppose I don’t know why I was crying.  Because girls cry and because life is confusing and once you lay some plans and you think you’ve got it figured out, you realize you know nothing and everything changes on a dime. 

The next morning I woke up strangely calm.  The day was busy and productive and happy, and the more I thought about staying in Utah the more I felt fine with it.  Greg felt the same.

We sat on it all Tuesday and all Wednesday and by Thursday I had decided to ask my boss for my job back.

I marched on in to the principal's office, much like the day I told him, with all the brazen confidence in the world, that I was quitting.  Only this time there was less brazen.  And less confidence.

"Er... there's been a change of plans.  We're looking at staying in Utah.  My husband is going into a different job field.... could I stay?"

My boss had the same look of pain in his eyes that he did when I told him I was quitting, but this time it was mixed with pity.  "Bonnie..." he started.  "You know we filled your position..."

Of course I already knew that, but I suppose in my head I was hoping my principal could invent a position out of thin air for me, or call the new hire back and say, "So sorry!  She changed our mind!  The teacher wants to stay!"  Logically I understood.  Emotionally I was beat up.

"If we have any more English teachers leaving,  we'll hire you back on in a heartbeat.  I would love to have you stay.  I would fight for you, I would, but my hands are tied.  You should start looking for other jobs...and if I can do anything to help you get hired on anywhere, you just let me know."

And so Thursday  the job search began in Utah.  Only this time it was much easier.  Because I know people and I know the schools and I know the system.  Thursday afternoon I talked to my friend who emailed her principal who said she had heard from another principal that there was an opening at a nearby high school.  I hadn't even done a screening interview for that school district but I figured, "Ah, to heck with it" and showed up at the end of the day on Friday with a skirt and a resume.

"I'd like to talk to the principal," I demanded.  I was jobless and completely vulnerable and that sort of situation calls for a false sense of pride and arrogance.  Or something.

The principal wasn't there, but I was directed to a vice principal who was out patrolling the halls, surrounded by teenagers anxious for their weekend to start and teachers full of complaint.  I couldn't get a word in edgewise as a teacher yapped his ear off. so I stood there real awkwardlike, next to the man, for probably six or seven minutes before he realized I was waiting to talk to him.

I knew the timing wasn't ideal and I knew the place was completely chaotic, but I chucked my resume at him and blurted out, "I heard you have an English opening!  I was going to move to California and now I'm not, but I resigned from Copper Hills and they filled my position so I want to work here now!"  The man was taken aback, no doubt, but also intrigued.  He promised he would talk to the principal, but he thought the position had most likely been filled.  They had been interviewing all week.

Imagine my surprise on Monday afternoon when I got a call from the principal.  "Can you come for an interview?" he asked.
"Sure... when?"
"Tomorrow?"

Which was how on Tuesday after school I found myself sitting in the conference room at the high school interviewing for a job I didn't know existed and wouldn't fathom interviewing for a week ago.  What a difference seven days makes!

My strategy with interviews is to go with the truth.  The truth is this: I really like my job and I really like those hoodlum teenagers.  Everything else is just details.

It seemed to work.  The very next morning, in the middle of second period, an email popped up, offering me the position.

I was remarkably happy.  But I didn't jump or scream or giggle.

Instead, I leaned back and read the words twice ,and as I did so I felt an enormous weight lifted off of me.  It was almost as if the burden of the last months- the endless applications, the cbest and ctel tests, the emails to people who don't reply, the phone calls to answerless numbers, the voicemails to responseless machines- the scrimping, the saving, the apartment hunting, the endless stress- it was as if every last part of that melted away as I read those words.  I closed my eyes and uttered a silent prayer and allowed myself for just one moment to bask in that feeling of complete peace.

I know that not everyone believes in God, and that's fine.  But I don't think anyone can deny that there is some kind of deep inner peace that we all desire in our lives.  Sometimes we are filled with it. Sometimes we have not an ounce.  In that moment, reading those words and sitting back in my chair while my students worked on their prompt, I was filled forehead to toenail with that inner peace.  And simple as that, that was how I knew without a doubt that we were making the right decision.

Strangely enough, out of everyone that will inevitably hear of our change of plans, I have been most afraid of the reaction of my blog readers.  Isn't that funny?  I worried and stressed about how to write it, about what to say.  How to explain myself.  It was almost as if I felt that I had let you down in some way by not moving to California- like you wanted to read about my move and now I'm not moving and- she's a fraud!  A total fraud!  But I finally came to the conclusion that moving states with no jobs when you don't feel right at all about it just to please people who read what you write online is totally ludicrous.

Greg will have to go back to school and get a second undergrad degree- this time in behavioral science with an emphasis on family relations.  I'm proud of the guy no matter what he does.  His program should be finished in a year and a half and then we'll do grad school and it will be four to five more years of school for the old chap.  But we can start to plan a little.  Map out our future just a tad  Maybe put down some money on a house and have some nights together and maybe, just maybe start thinking about little future redheaded children.

It isn't what we planned on, and it isn't what we thought we wanted, but it is what's right for us.

72 comments:

  1. Congratulations on finding some peace! AND on the new job! Who knows why God works the way he does, but he sure does have it all figured out, doesn't he?

    I'm in school to be a counselor myself, and those programs are really, really supportive and family friendly. I go to school in VA, which is the hardest state to get licensed in, so if you ever have any questions... I'll do my best to help!

    ReplyDelete
  2. So excited for you! I am so glad things worked out ok for you in your last minute job search! God is amazing in how he finds a way for us, maybe not the way we were planning on! Love you Bonnie!! You're amazing!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yay for you guys! I'm happy you were able to find a job so quickly.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Congratulations on your new job! What a crazy week it has been for you! Without a doubt, Peace is a beautiful thing. I believe the adventure you're about to go on is much greater than the one you would have found in California :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Congratulations on the new job. Happy to hear things are starting work out, and that the weight of moving to CA is lifted off of your shoulders. :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. That is great! I'm happy for you (and suddenly a tad jealous that you get to keep teaching, but hopefully that will melt away as I really do love my life). It really is insanely easy to get an interview in our district (or Canyons, but we all know they're practically the same), you know compared to interviewing in CA, but I only know that from seeing them fill my position. It's nice to be an insider sometimes. :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. This made me tear up. This is what I needed to hear. Sometimes planning something you think is right is not. I am soo excited for you!!! Xo

    ReplyDelete
  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  9. is it possible that the good lord wanted you at that jordan instead of copper hills? and all this chaos you've encountered is the cosmos rearranging itself to get you there? that some student at jordan is in need of your particular set of teaching skills?

    also, why does greg have to get a second undergraduate degree? why can't he just apply to graduate school now?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm wondering the same thing! :)

      Delete
  10. Congrats! This is so funny but I just had to fill my husband in because I had told him your whole story. We both think its a great idea! You guys know best what feels right and what just doesn't anymore. BTW my sister in law majored in theatre at BYU and then got her masters in gerontology and is now doing a phd in gerontology/performing arts kind of a thing. So it is possible to do something totally sifferent like therapy with a theatre degree :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. I had a strange feeling you wouldn't end up in Cali. That said, I admire your pluckiness about making it happen. Even though there were some major hurdles you stood up to them and set about climbing over them. Congrats on the new job too! English teaching jobs, man. They're hard to come by! I just hope they don't ask you to close up shop. If you do, you'll tell us where you open up again? (From someone who had to close a blog and reopen for work.)

    A few words about crying. I believe Rufio said it best with, "Tears are Feelings you can't say."

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm happy everything worked out...you found another job and you're staying in a place you love...I do have to admit I am bummed that I don't get to meet you. Overall with how unfairly unstable (did that make sense? sorry grad school has fried my brain) the CA teaching system is, it's better you have your peace of mind where you are.
    Congrats on the new job!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. God works in mysterious ways, I like getting to watch him work, does that sound weird? I guess I don't know how else to put it :)

    Congrats on the new job & major kudos to you guys for doing what was right for you, even if it meant a HUGE shift in plans!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Meghan, I love the way you wrote "I like getting to watch him work". What an awesome way to think of it, just sitting back and trusting and getting to watch. Love it!

      Delete
  14. I am so excited for you! I'm glad you now have peace after all those decisions you were having to make. What a blessing to have a job right away and that things are falling in place for the both of you. And such exciting news about Greg!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Congratulations on the job! I'm glad you both figured out what you really wanted before you moved and became really stressed! It's great to see a couple that really communicates and cares for each other. :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. This is so crazy... I pretty much just went through the exact same thing! I was ready to quit BYU and move back home to New York. I sold my contract for my apartment, packed up my apartment into my car, and was ready to leave just this Wednesday. All of the sudden, Monday night, everything got in the way. God gave me the most in-your-face answer to NOT leave Utah or BYU. So now I'm staying! Funny how things DON'T work out.

    ReplyDelete
  17. That anxiety and weight and pressure and unknowns that you wrote about at the top of this post? That is a constant in the life of an actor. It just is. It doesn't go away fully ever. I know people who have careers and awards and money that anyone would think meant they were happy and calm, and yet, they have the same anxiety all the time. It's just part of it, and making peace with it is the first step. I've been doing this for over 10 years and I still have about 3 or 4 breakdowns a year! That being said... it is always said if something else tugs your heart, it's best to go toward it and away from show business. I think it's very brave that your Hubs heard this calling to go toward being a therapist and is following it. It's so similar to wanting to be an actor - you just want to get inside the minds of other humans, and study them, and help humanity as a whole. And very brave of you to have just shown up at that school! You both make bold moves, while trusting God. What could be better? Congrats on the new paths!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Congratulations!! You sound really happy and at peace with your decision! I think your blog readers will be happy and supportive to know that you feel relieved! :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Wow!!! That is a huge change in plans! But I think it's the smart thing to do, not that you really care what I or anyone else thinks. Congrats on the job offer.. are you going to take it? I heard from a little bird (Beck) that you had applied at another local school. How far is Jordan High from you? Where will Greg go to school? Love you!! I'm glad for the relief and peace you are feeling...

    ReplyDelete
  20. So, so happy you are both happy and content, no matter where you live or what job you have. As long as the two of you are at peace with the decision, that is all that counts, right?! Looking forward to seeing this newest chapter unfold, congrats on feeling good again...happy summer!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Didn't everyone on here tell you it would all work out? And so it did. Congrats on the new job. And all the other news.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I think it's definitely better you guys realized this BEFORE you moved, right? There is no shame in changing plans. Sometimes the best adventures happen that way.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Like you told Greg, "We support you" I am so glad you have God's peace. Isn't it amazing how He works things out to our benefit? Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete
  24. I understand the confusion and crying simply because. Life can be overwhelming. How do we know what the right decisions are?! Here is one of my favorite quotes that I try to keep in mind more these days: "If you wait to do everything until you're sure it's right, you'll probably never do much of anything." - Win Borden. SO true. Good luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  25. God is clearly working. Glad you are at peace.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Sooooo happy for you. Think of the day to day stress you would've had if you'd moved, with no jobs and crazy rent? I believe the same thing - when you make the right decision, you know it and feel it deep down.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'm just happy to hear more stories about your hoodlum students. I love me some good teenager angst!

    ReplyDelete
  28. On a much smaller scale, I can totally relate to this post. We are at the end of our journey now that started 3 years ago. Three years ago, both me and my husband were newly jobless and moving from everything we built (a big, nice home, and a comfortable lifestyle with two jobs) into a quadplex in a town where we knew nobody for my husband to follow his dream: law school. It's been the most difficult journey, but somehow all the pieces fell together and it worked out just the way it was supposed to. :-) I'm so happy that everything fell into place for y'all.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Not to leave you with a total cliche, but you know what happens when we make plans? God laughs.

    It sounds like God had different a different plan for y'all. She gave y'all time to figure it out (and to learn some hard lessons along the way), but She opened Greg's heart and then your heart to realize Her plan for y'all.

    ReplyDelete
  30. So happy that things are coming together for you! Being in education myself, I always love reading about our adventure in the classroom. I may be hundreds and hundreds of miles away, but I can tell just through your writing that you are a great asset for whatever school is lucky enough to hire you! :)

    And sure, you may not be going on a crazy adventure in California. But my experience has told me that working with teenagers is an adventure in itself. :)

    ReplyDelete
  31. So happy for y'all! Glad everything is coming together. I hope you love the new school :)

    ReplyDelete
  32. As long as you have peace with it and you know this is what's best for you- YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's so exciting. And while it's not a California adventure, Greg going back to school will be a different sort of adventure.

    ReplyDelete
  33. I'm so glad you've found that inner peace! It's so difficult when plans change but I think it's awesome how you went with it, trusted, and found something new and awesome. Good luck with your new adventure! xo

    ReplyDelete
  34. This is such a happy post, Bonnie! I'm glad you found peace!

    ReplyDelete
  35. I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU! (can't you tell by my CAPS?). Seriously. I jumped through those same hoops. My husband & I moved from South Carolina to St. George and 4 months later moved back because he realized he had everything he really wanted in SC. We love St. George of course but his home is here. And now we can laugh about how much money and time we blew (of course before NOW, I kinda cried).
    I truly know in my heart that God directs us and we are allowed to make our own mistakes but that if we listen - he's telling us.
    I'm just glad you and Greg heard it before all that time and money :)

    ReplyDelete
  36. That is awesome! Congrats to you! Through this post I could feel your the weight lifted of your shoulders! Hey, sometimes I think in our hearts we know it isn't right, but we feel its what we need to do and try to make ourselves believe it is right and it burdens us! I am glad that you decided to stay. I think deep down it is what you guys deep in your hearts wanted! Best of Luck!

    ReplyDelete
  37. I'm so happy for you. You have a way of putting things into words that we can all relate to, even if we aren't in the same situation. Congratulations...I'm so glad everything is working out.

    ReplyDelete
  38. My husband and I have found the same thing... our best laid plans don't always work out but Someone Else often has an even better plan. We've been all over the world in only a few years and could have never foreseen this journey at the start. Its so hard to be flexible and take the opportunities that come your way but there can be great joy in that! Congrats on your suddenly-less-stressful future!

    ReplyDelete
  39. Congrats! Such a huge, major life change... but it sounds like it will be the best for you:)

    ReplyDelete
  40. I am so genuinely happy for you. You are so right, we all want that inner peace and it is the best feeling in the world. I have this quote pinned on my "Words to Live By" board on Pinterest (Gosh, I love that board), and it says "Going back to a simpler life is not a step backwards." I have to remind myself of that ALL. THE. TIME. At the end of the day, you have to do what just FEELS right for you and your family. And I think you're pretty darn brave for actually doing it :) Congratulations on the new job! It's all a part of some amazing plan that we can't even begin to understand now.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Plans change, goals change. The real show of strength of character is being able to roll with them and stay on your feet. I don't comment too often, but I was really, really happy to read this and hear that things are working out well for the two of you. Who cares if how it works out was the original plan or not! :)

    ReplyDelete
  42. Oh my gosh. This is so wonderful. I'm so glad you get to stay and you get to do what you wanna do and the weight has been lifted! I'm so happy for yoU!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Oh Bonnie! What a relief! I'm so glad this has worked out! And I know it will be for the best. I will just have to forgive you for betraying CH to become a beet digger... :)

    xo, Jessica

    ReplyDelete
  44. "The best laid schemes of mice and men often go awry."

    And here were my thoughts on your move:
    Well, if she moves and stops teaching and becomes all California on us, I probably won't have much reason to check her blog as frequently.

    So I guess it worked out for me too ;)

    Congrats on the new job and the new-same for your guys!

    ReplyDelete
  45. I LOVED this post!!!! It's always a humbling experience when you are trying so hard to make your plans work and chaos is everywhere but the second you take the route that He has planned for you, everything falls into place, even when it shouldn't!!

    Amberly
    http://lifewithamberlyandjoe.com

    ReplyDelete
  46. Changing life plans can be so crazy and exciting! It's kind of amazing when you throw a plan aside and think, "Well, where do we go from here?" and you suddenly realize all the millions of possibilities open to you! Congratulations on the new job :) I'm excited to read about your newest adventures (especially those hypothetical future children.)

    ReplyDelete
  47. D&C 9: 8-9 comes immediately to mind:

    8 But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.

    9 But if it be not right you shall have no such feelings, but you shall have a stupor of thought that shall cause you to forget the thing which is wrong.

    I've sometimes had times in my life when I worked really hard towards something, but it seemed like everything was against me in the decision. And lo and behold, the same thing always seemed to happen--a sudden change of direction that brought overwhelming peace.

    Don't worry about us blog readers so much. We love you no matter what :)
    .

    ReplyDelete
  48. I started a new job last month and will be buying my first house (with my husband, our daughter and dog) on Tuesday and can say - change. is. stressful! That line about desiring inner peace is spot on. We all work for this. So happy you worked hard and made the most of an unknown situation. I hope you're able to celebrate this weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  49. I'm so glad you're staying! this is one lucky state.

    ReplyDelete
  50. I'm so happy you guys found the right decision for you!!! I can't even imagine all the stress that was put on you!
    xoxo
    Dani
    www.thatfitnesschic.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  51. Awww, I am glad you are doing what is right for you! So what if you stay in Utah? For now? Maybe forever? Live YOUR life. You really don't owe us any explanation ;)

    I hope y'all go get a couples massage now! hehe!!

    -dot

    ReplyDelete
  52. Bonnie I am so happy that you found a new job so quickly! From what I have heard Utah is better then California anyway! Go you and Greg for talking things out :)

    ReplyDelete
  53. What you really have is a new adventure. One neither of you planned.

    ReplyDelete
  54. This was a heartfelt post. And, I know exactly what you mean about life having other plans. I think I felt that inner peace when I finally let go of trying to control every aspect of my life. When don't allow for any deviation from your "plan" all you are left with is stress and disappointment. You may not be having a California adventure, yet, this new path will be an adventure in-and-of-itself. Good luck!

    xx

    ReplyDelete
  55. This is so AWESOME Bonnie! In life, it seems that more times than not, we have a plan for ourselves and we scrape and struggle and do everything we can to make OUR plan work. And then the Lord steps in and says "no, no, no" and everything changes and it's TOTALLY unexpected, but ends up being so wonderful! I'm happy you guys are staying and that you feel at peace. What a wonderful blessing

    ReplyDelete
  56. Cute post! :)

    Kelly xx

    http://thebellelavieproject.blogspot.co.uk/

    ReplyDelete
  57. Your gut feeling and inner peace are always the right things to listen to! So happy y'all are staying close to family also. It will all make sense if a few years I bet. :) Yay Bonnie!

    ReplyDelete
  58. I think this is AWESOME! Awesome, because God always knows the way and He always leads us there. Are there bumps sometimes? Absolutely. It's how we grow and learn to trust Him more.
    This reminds me of a 2+ years back-and-forth my husband and I went through with him in one state, and me in another ... and I didn't even know if I wanted to teach or not, etc, etc, etc. Now we are together, and super happy. Life isn't perfect, but it still feels safe and secure because I feel like God put us where we needed to be so we could learn and grow closer - to each other and to Him. He took teaching away from me (and I didn't feel guilty for dumping it, that way) ... which was a blessing because I had a surgery for an ectopic pregnancy months after the school year would have started, and I just could not imagine dealing with that physically and emotionally - with a new principal and 30 5th graders - and no lesson plans prepared because it was unexpected, etc.
    Anyway, you are right ... there's such a relief, peace, when you just finally stop trying to force something that just doesn't feel quite right, and when things find a way to work themselves out.

    ReplyDelete
  59. As a former Californian, and from a family of educators, I think you're made the right choice for long-term career happiness, growth, and security. From the perspective of a gal who made the life-changing state-to-state move a few times, I can say this: If the thought of NOT going filled you more with relief than disappointment, you made the right choice to not go. It's stressful and emotional and OF COURSE it brought tears, just being overwhelming and last minute and all, but it sounds like a great challenge and a great beginning for you both. YAY!
    (and kudos to Greg, and he can still stay in theatre just the more honest kind, and if he can survive studying Psych in academia, he'll be a great therapist)

    ReplyDelete
  60. Congratulations! I'm so happy for you! It's amazing what God can do for you when you do all the planning you are able and then take it one day at a time. Good job! I loved reading about the way the decision came together!

    ReplyDelete
  61. Bonnie that is awesome!!!! I am so excited for you two in your new adventure!!! It may not be California but it's what I'd right for you and Greg and that's all that maters. Congratulations on the new job. It will be good..let me know if I can help you out with ANYTHING!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  62. Bonnie, this post. Wow. Your honestly and vulnerability is literally moving. This right here, this post, this is what blogging is all about. Not only do you document your triumphs, but you document your fears and your failures. Your honesty is just so refreshing and I admire you and your courage to change your life so drastically at the drop of a pin. You are such a beautiful woman and you inspire me. I want you to know that I didn't just sponsor your blog to get at all your readers, but I chose to sponsor YOU because I enjoy your blog. And this post right here, I'm just so thankful that my $50 gets to go to such an incredible woman. You are deserving of nothing but happiness. Good luck in this new chapter my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  63. I think God has us chasing dreams that may never work out because they lead us to where he really wants us! If it weren't for y'all possibly moving to California, he may not have had this desire to go to school for something that he could be awesome at or be fulfilled by and you may not have changed schools and who knows, this new school may be better than the last and you could be so thankful to be there! God works in mysterious ways and it doesn't always make sense, but he definitely has his hand in everything. Good luck on your new chapter in life, it may not be california and all adventure and glam, but it's your story and you're going to make it a great one! :)

    ReplyDelete
  64. I love this post so much! Congratulations on a change of plans. Isn't it amazing how Heavenly Father has the ability to fling doors open for us to launch us in the right direction? Maybe all that planning for California and the lack of things coming together were just the catalyst you (and your dear hubbie) needed to push you toward the right change for your family. I love that you wrote this. I love that you support your husband in whatever he decides to do. And I love that you just totally inspired the rest of us to listen to those little promptings and act on them. Best of luck with your new adventure in the same place. :)

    ReplyDelete
  65. Congratulations on everything that has changed! It sounds like a very eventful few days, and I am glad that it all has worked out so far for you and your husband!

    ReplyDelete
  66. Wow, this is truly amazing! I know I read your blog a lot and don't always comment, but I have gone through something similar. My husband has changed his track three times now, and is about to graduate in May (err... a year from now.) It's tough, but it's worth it.

    ReplyDelete
  67. Wow! Big change of plans. Congrats and keep your chin up!

    ReplyDelete
  68. Awesome! It takes courage to listen to those promptings and ACT on them. It's much easier to go with the momentum you already have. Good for you! Maybe Jordan HS is going to be the best place for you in Utah.

    ReplyDelete
  69. You should seriously write a book or something - I was so interested in this and loved reading it! I thought that I was actually reading a book for a moment as you are such a good writer:D

    http://katiesbeautyblogxo.blogspot.co.uk/

    ReplyDelete
  70. Oh goodness I know those tears - those tears when it's just too much too fast and you need to take away the edge of it all to decide how you really feel about something. I'm super excited for you about finding a way to feel settled with life these days. I'm excited for you and Greg together, and I'm excited that you're going to keep teaching - I like those posts a lot. Yay all around :)

    ReplyDelete