The Life of Bon: HOW TO BE HOT.

Sunday, August 05, 2012

HOW TO BE HOT.

HOW TO LOOK HOT NO MATTER WHAT YOU'RE DOING

BY THE LIFE OF BON


I feel bad for anybody who doesn't look one hundred percent rocking 24/7.  I have the whole fashion thing down pat so I figured it's time to share my knowledge with the blogging world.  You all are clearly in need of an expert.  The Daybook, watch out, I'm taking over your reign as cutest fashion blogger ever!

In the above picture I am playing tennis with Hubs.  My outfit is very stylin as you can tell.  To copy this outfit you will need the following:

1.  A pair of ambiguous pants.  Are they long pants?  No... not quite.  Shorts?  No, not that either.  Capris?  Too baggy for that.  WHAT IN SAM'S HILL ARE THEY?  Guess we'll never know which makes them that much cuter!  Remember, the more confused people are by your look, the cuter it is!

(Answer:  They are Hubs' shorts.  And if you think it's pretty messed up that I have the same size of waist as Hubs, you are not alone.)

2. A big, brown, bulky belt.  None of these cute, skinny belts.  No cool colors like blue or orange- you will need just a big brown clunker.  This makes your waist look bigger than normal, which as we all know, is the perfect complement to any look.

3.  A shirt that is too tight for you.  Although you can't see it in this picture, a tight grey T-shirt is the best thing to wear when participating in any physical activity.  It allows for maximum under arm sweat stains that everyone can see when you raise your arms.  Tacos=the new trend in fashion.  Try to keep up, will you?

4.  Neon shoelaces.  The whole outfit should be a very blah, somber color EXCEPT the shoelaces.  Look for a gray or black outfit and then add a bit of neon to really confuse everybody who looks at you.  In my case I chose neon pink.  Neon green and neon blue are also great.  If you're really daring you can try polka dotted or striped shoelaces to really set you apart from the crowd.

5.  Don't forget the hair barrette clipped to your pocket and the alien looking sunglasses.  These accessories really complete the outfit.  Remember, confusion=cuteness.

There you have it, folks!  How to look like a million bucks no matter what you are up to.  I'm full of stylish advice and wisdom so make sure to check back often to see all my super cute looks!  Next week I might even show you the sweats, flip flops, and bandana that I wear when I wash my car. 

24 comments:

  1. ha ha hahahahahah

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  2. ummm, i love this. first, i love that you are playing tennis. it's my favorite sport. second, love your fashion tips. i may try them this week. lastly, i too have the same size waist as my hubby. damn you skinny men.

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  3. LOVE this post! You totally just made me laugh for like 30 minutes :)

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  4. I absolutely love this- you crack me up :) Also, I am definitely guilty of having the same size waist as my hubs. I wear his workout shorts all the time (when they are clean, obviously. I felt I needed to clarify that :))
    Katie
    abritandheryank.blogspot.com

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  5. bahahahahaha. Love it! Fashion blogger of the year!!

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  6. SO funny. Love it. And those are shants, riiiighhht? Not shorts + Not quite pants= shants. You rock 'em, girl!

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  7. hahaha!! awesomeness!! you're playing tennis who cares what you look like...I'm 1/2 convinced (with exceptions of professionals) anyone who looks good playing tennis is not really playing...beleive me during my tennis phase i never really learned, but i rocked those skirts ;)

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  8. Gurrrrrl, you so funnay! But seriously, you made me laugh a whole bunch. You're quite darling and all those on the cusp of trendsetting fashion know - darling=hot!

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  9. Hahahahahahahaha! I laughed for a solid 5 minutes! That's an outfit I'd end up wearing...at least I'm on trend.

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  10. Haha! I love it. Styling!

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  11. I'm right there with you. My husband has my same waist size....when I'm not 9 months pregnant. which I currently am. Let's hope I see that waist size again! **fingers crossed!

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  12. You are freaking hilarious!! And adorable! Thanks for making me laugh. :)

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  13. haha okay so I am not the only one who is the same size as my husband! Awesome! Great post!

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  14. Oh my gosh, I just love you. So much. I'm cracking up! I had to keep scrolling up to the picture because I didn't even notice so many of those gems until you mentioned them.

    And for the record, I've worn my husband's shorts on more than one occasion. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

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  15. I think you look hawt! I even said it in a cool, trendy way so you know I mean it!

    I also wear my husbands big belt. Mostly because I don't own a belt but I have been working out and my pants don't fit so well anymore.

    Wow... Could I sound anymore conceited?

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  16. Hi Bonnie!

    Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and following. I'm so excited to follow you back- I LOVE your blog!:) Hope you have a fabulous Monday!

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  17. this totally cracked me up! great post!

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  18. thank you for bringing light to the issue of same-sized-spouses. I think we need a support group?

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  19. HAhaha!
    can I just say, those ambiguous pants really highlight your toned calves. :) (ps, the hair clip is my favorite. I've been known to do that a time or two)

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  20. "It allows for maximum under arm sweat stains that everyone can see when you raise your arms. " BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! :)

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  21. You had me cracking up at "ambiguous pants." I love you Bonnie.

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  22. I'm reading this wearing my boyfriend's basketball shorts. Hooray for being able to wear your significant other's clothing!

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